Joan - What a beautiful posting.  It makes me somewhat ashamed of what I
am not doing.  I do play the piano for the retirement home (I don't live
there, I  just play) and have for 8 years, and when one of the people who
attend the chapel is in the hospital, I visit, and when they are ill at
home I try to call, but since my love moved out of state, I've not had
too much incentive.  But you have motivated me and I thank you.  Jo Ann
from Houston
On Sat, 12 May 2001 21:38:28 -0500 Stanley Snyder
<[log in to unmask]> writes:
>     There is a place deep in everyone’s heart where there abides
>gentleness, goodness and light-I believe this as certainly as I
>believe
>that the sun will rise tomorrow. Sometimes, this place is very small
>and
>very well hidden or sometimes, it is covered over with the scar tissue
>of failed relationships, hurt, despair and betrayal.
>     Last week, my darling daughter asked me to watch a movie about a
>beauty queen called “Beautiful.” I must admit that this movie and its
>subject matter appealed to me not at all-but to keep peace in the
>family, I settled in to watch.
>     OK-I’m the first to admit when I’m wrong and I was really wrong
>about this one!! First of all, it is directed by Sally Field and
>secondly it starred Minnie Driver as the determined, win-at-any-cost,
>unloved and longing to be loved beauty queen. Without giving away any
>more
>of the movie, let me tell you about just one scene.
>      The gorgeous beauty queen is determined to have her mother
>accompany her to the finals of a Miss America-like contest, so that
>she
>will have someone, anyone there when the camera shows where her family
>is supposed to be sitting. The mother refuses and in desperation, the
>beauty queen cries out-“haven’t you ever heard of the Pomeranian
>orphans?”
>     Of course, she meant the orphans of Romania, that war-torn
>country
>where an entire generation of children have grown up without any sort
>of
>nurturing or love or human touch.
>     Now, I must tell you about Betty. Betty is an older woman who has
>PD and resides in the nursing home here in Chillicothe. I have visited
>with her on a few occasions-whenever it is convenient for me to get up
>there; usually when my kids are there for the monthly Mass with the
>patients. Otherwise, I get reports about Betty from my Deacon on his
>weekly visit. Lately, the reports have not been good. Betty hasn’t
>been
>out of her wheelchair for weeks, he told me. And Betty is barely able
>to
>communicate. She is bent over and withdrawn.
>     I remembered the time that my friends, Caz, Lisa & Linda went to
>visit Betty with me and how much she loved having a copy of our
>book-“Voices From The Parking Lot.” On both of those occasions, Betty
>had been soft spoken but completely understandable-to other parkies,
>of
>course!
>    It is a real test of will for me to go to the nursing home: there
>are many Alzheimer’s patients there and they evoke the still raw
>memories of my daddy at the Vet’s hospital, crying when we had to
>leave
>him-even though I’m not sure if he knew who we were. And there are the
>patients with Parkinson’s…and it is always unsettling for me to
>realize
>that there, but for the grace of God and the love of my family, is my
>future. I know that it is hard, also, on my kids to see me there, with
>my disability as apparent as those of the residents.
>    I had to go see Betty.
>    I went in and it was just as the Deacon had told me-Betty was
>sitting in her chair, a once lovely woman who still took what must be
>tremendous efforts to keep herself up. But, Betty was curled up in her
>wheelchair and it took her several long minutes before I could rouse
>her
>from her thoughts-or her memories-or whatever one does when there is
>nothing else to do.
>     I finally made contact and saw her perk up a bit. I pinned a
>“Survivor’s Heart” on her shirt (a gift from my dear friend Caz)-it is
>a
>filigreed silver pin with a band-aid on it. I told her about my
>upcoming
>golf outing and promised to call her daughter to see if she would
>bring
>Betty up to the festivities. My sweet, compassionate daughter came up
>and hugged her and I promised that with all my friends with
>Parkinson’s
>Disease coming to town, we’d be sure to visit her several times. We
>held
>hands during Mass and she wouldn’t let go.
>     When it came time for us to receive Communion, I stood up and
>walked over to the Priest but something made me look back…and there
>right behind me-making her way without a wheelchair or a walker, came
>Betty!!
>    As I rejoiced at the sparkle in her eyes and the determined look
>on
>her face, it occurred to me that human touch is just as important to
>our
>well-being as any of our meds. For that brief and shining moment, all
>was right in the world and my Communion was one of thanksgiving and
>humility. It was truly a humbling experience to know that I had been
>used by God-in spite of my many weaknesses and fears to deliver to
>Betty
>a sense of hope, a feeling of usefulness and self-worth.
>     I was ashamed of myself for the many excused that I had made-good
>excuses, no doubt, for not visiting her for what must seem like
>forever
>and I vowed never to make her wait for me again. It will require a
>real
>commitment from me to keep this vow but I have seen first hand the
>healing power of love.
>    Like the “Pomeranian orphans” in the movie, it is all about
>redemption-our own and that of all of the people with whom we come in
>contact with each day, little realizing that we may impact others
>lives
>so profoundly.
>
>
>--
>Joan E. Blessington Snyder     49/11
>[log in to unmask]
>http://www.geocities.com/joanbsnyder/
>"Hang tough............no way through it but to do it."
>    Chris-in-the-Morning  (Northern Exposure)
>
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