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To Camilla Flinterman}

Camilla -- I believe your observations of your husband's turning more
inward in his concerns is probably true in most every case when a once-
healthy individual is forced beyond his own will to begin the task of
dealing with his new "identity"...that of pain, disability, sadness,
boredom, and a grieving for the loss of his former self.

As a person who has had pd for almost 20 years, I am very fortunate to be
relatively free of pain, disability, depression, or boredom as long as my
meds are cooperating.  When they are not, and my body begins to feel semi-
paralyzed and like my insides are twisted up in tight knots, and finding a
"comfortable" position to sit or lie down becomes an impossibility, I,
too, become very self-oriented because I feel that nobody could possibly
understand what this feels like.  I don't want anyone to feel sorry for
me...just to understand that they cannot "feel for me" what they have
never experienced.  It's a very lonely feeling at times, Camilla, but it
is one that we must try to exchange....for acceptance.

Warm Regards,

Janice Long