Paul

You have a Parkinson's-related problem, that's creating a "marriage-related
problem," as I read it.   Your wife is SCARED SILLY right now!  How, if you're
threatening her can she trust her not to physically harm her?

Just try to picture what it must be like for your wife to live with someone
who's seemingly going wild and threatening her life.

You said you "get "very loud and angry and threaten to put a bullet thru her
head."  How does she know you're not actually going to do that?

I suggest you MUST get yourself to a movement disorder specialist ASAP, and
show him/her a copy of the message you posted here on the PD List.

Most likely a change in your drug dosage or adding/stopping a med or two could
return you to the man she knows.... and trusts.   AND loves...

Please, please go to see a movement disorder specialist, Paul!!   And stay in
touch with us here on the List 'cause we CARE about both you AND your wife.

Barb Mallut
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----------
From:   Parkinson's Information Exchange on behalf of paul s mccahan
Sent:   Sunday, May 10, 1998 1:11 PM
To:     Multiple recipients of list PARKINSN

From: pmccahan
To: [log in to unmask]
Date: Sun, 10 May 1998 14:44:44
Subject: I need help, advise,  information,  a friend, this is a
        terable situation!!
Message-ID: <[log in to unmask]>

Dear Parkinson People,

The imediate situation is this:  My wife is telling me that I'm
history....That sahe can't take it any more .  She's going to put me in a
nersing home  Sell  Stock,  sell the house.

What br0ought this on. you're asking?

I was  getting thru the night w/o calling out for help,[confusion,
perceived weakness  which I thought prevented me from making it to the
bathroom  toilet...fear of messing up the bed which did not happen....a
couple of nights of this and she's kicking me out.

The worst thing is that I get very  loud and angry one time I ran at her
sayings that I wanted to "Put a bullet thru her head.  When I'm "On " I
am generally the person that she knows is Paul.  I've started going  "On"
and   "off"   one  to 5 X/day.....Its getting  to the point where  I
can't deal with my life....  When I'm "On" I'm  slightly manic...most of
my friends say its a-ok.

What  I WANT IS A WAY TO get thru the night better....Like when I have a
prostrate gland like a 20 yr old, why do   I have to pea so much?  Why
do I feel like I wired....a feeling that is hard to describe;  a;; I can
say is   that it is in tollerable at times....some times I can make the
spasoms go away by by certain breathing exercises.

`I take meds 8X/day.  5:45,  8:00, 10:30,  1:00 pm, 3:15,  5:45pm,
                                                     and 8:00pm.   At
these times I  take two, 25/100  carbidopa/levidopa.    At 5:45,  1:00
and 8:00pm I take mirapex   4.5mG./day.  The neuro I'm using for Rx's
doesn't  seem to know what to do.

Movemenrt t Problem:

I have trouble "bending the knee"  when I'm off  and trying to walk
somewhere.  Bending the knee = lifting the leg when walking.   I think
I can't do it...but if I stop and deloiberatly concentrate on my left leg
I CAN LIFT IT.

 At this point my wife calles me a demented liar.

I was diag. in 1991 and I'm  65 .
Please help,  Paul

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