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Thought you might enjoy a laugh or two...

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Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1998 07:27:55 -0500 (EST)
From: Lawrence E Cope <[log in to unmask]>
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To: ali deale <[log in to unmask]>
Subject: Quick Thoughts (fwd)
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---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Thu, 12 Nov 1998 07:25:59 -0500 (EST)
From: Lawrence E Cope <[log in to unmask]>
To: Lawrence E Cope <[log in to unmask]>
Subject: Quick Thoughts



**********************************************
Quick Thoughts...
**********************************************

* A bus station is where a bus stops.  A train station is
  where a train stops.  On my desk I have a work station.

* Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?

* If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP?

* Does fuzzy logic tickle?

* If they arrested the Energizer Bunny, would they charge
  it with battery?

* I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

* How come you never hear about gruntled employees?

* I don't have a solution, but I admire your problem.

* If a tin whistle is made out of tin (and it is), then
  what, exactly, is a fog horn made out of?

* If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool
  came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?

* Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?

* I believe the only time the world beats a path to my door
  is when I'm in the bathroom.

* Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

* What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of
  bald men?

* What WAS the best thing before sliced bread?

* If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to
  be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

* Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Orientals
  throw hamburgers?

* Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck
  together?

* Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

* Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they
  are in charge of everything outdoors?

* Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll believe
  you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.

* Why do we wait until a pig is dead to "cure" it?

* Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

* Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

* Whatever happened to Absorbine Senior?




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