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Darwin,

Now thas a real pome, one fur real coinsewers.  Are ya gunna campane fur
pote  larriat?  Y'uhd be better than them highbinders frum the cities.  Ah
swallers some pate on bread an washes it down - ma throat's 'dh only part uh
me dat gets washed ever' day - mit a jugof Mateus rosee in a toast ta ya!!
----- Original Message -----
From: "Hawkins, Darwin" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Monday, February 14, 2000 2:16 PM
Subject: NONPD-Valentine's Day Poem


> To all my friends on the PIEN. Just getting back on long enough to send a
> Happy Valentine's Day wish to all them beautiful southern gals (US and
> Canadian) out there:
>
> A Red Neck Love Poem
>
> Collards is green,
> my dog's name is Blue
> and I'm so lucky
> to have a sweet thang like you.
>
> Yore hair is like cornsilk
> a-flapping in the breeze.
> Softer than Blue's
> and without all them fleas.
>
> You move like the bass,
> which excite me in May.
> You ain't got no scales
> but I luv you anyway.
>
> Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
> jist a-fry'n in the pan.
> Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
> right out of the can.
>
> You have some'a yore teeth,
> for which I am proud;
> I hold my head high
> when we're in a crowd.
>
> On special occasions,
> when you shave under yore arms,
> well, I'm in hawg heaven,
> and awed by yore charms.
>
> Still them fellers at work,
> they all want to know,
> what I did to deserve
> such a purdy, young doe.
>
> Like a good roll of duct tape
> yo're there fer yore man,
> to patch up life's troubles
> and fix what you can.
>
> Yo're as cute as a junebug
> a-buzzin' overhead.
> You ain't mean like those far ants
> I found in my bed.
>
> Cut from the best cloth
> like a plaid flannel shirt,
> you spark up my life
> more than a fresh load of dirt.
>
> When you hold me real tight
> like a padded gunrack,
> my life is complete;
> Ain't nuttin' I lack.
>
> Yore complexion, it's perfection,
> like the best vinyl sidin'.
> despite all the years,
> yore age, it keeps a hidin'.
>
> Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
> with a RC cold drank,
> we go together
> like a skunk goes with stank.
>
> Some men, they buy chocolate
> for Valentine's Day;
> They git it at Wal-Mart,
> it's romantic that way.
>
> Some men git roses
> on that special day
> from the cooler at Kroger.
> "That's impressive," I say.
>
> Some men buy fine diamonds
> from a flea market booth.
> "Diamonds are forever,"
> they explain, suave and couth.
>
> But for this man, honey,
> these won't do.
> Cause yor'e too special,
> you sweet thang you.
>
> I got you a gift,
> without taste nor odor,
> more useful than diamonds...
> IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!
>
> Luv, from yor romeo
>