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Just wanted to update you all: Firstly, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU all for your responses to me. There aren't many places where people like me can voice our frustrations and be willing to take the feedback we get (good &/or critical) - mainly because this is (for the most part!!!!) a group of educated men and women who cope and deal with PD 24/7. It's hard NOT to respect this list and all it does for us - MY MOM Mom told me on Sunday that she had had her appointment moved up to yesterday @ 2p - so of course I was on the phone a few hours later checking in with them - the neurologist they met with believes that mom's balance problems may be due to peripheral neuropathy - maybe having to do with her diabetes - maybe not. she is going back in saturday for more tests: MRI, cord "X-ray" (?). Her trembling hands he credits to "intention tremors" - which seem to contradict it's name - as it is an UNintentional shaking of the hands that comes with age, etc. She will follow up this Saturday's tests on 4.11.00 - So, I'm truly relieved for her because the doctor's advice was - 1. slow down 2. carry a cane 3. concentrate on yourself when you walk As all CGivers know - you "rarely" concentrate on yourself ! are rarely able to slow down (since you can rarely predict what's coming next !) and how many canes and collapsable wheelchairs can one or two people handle!!!!! Actually, it's sound advice and I believe, out of relief, Mom will give it a good shot. Especially the "concentrate on yourself" part. . . Secondly, Gila wrote today - It's a good thing that she's mostly my dad's responsibility, because I don't think I could handle it. Most of my function is really to support my dad, I guess. They have someone come in to care for my mom two days each week, and I go over on the weekend so my dad can get out. I also go over sometimes when they're both there just to provide some company, and my dad and I have started getting together during the day occasionally when the paid CG is there for my mom. My dad and I have always gotten along well, and we both enjoy our little get-togethers. (My parents live VERY near me.) The situation with my mom is really frustrating to me. She is martyring, demanding, controlling, and infantile. I've often observed that as people get older they seem to become caricatures of themselves. They don't change so much as they become more and more like themselves! My mom was always the way she is, but it's sorta like she was only an amateur before and now she's a *professional.* Know what I mean? I have more to say, but I think I'll stop for now and let this hang as my self-introduction. GILA: very good observations about the change in personality - and I think heightened also by a change in environment - whether brought about by age, illness, relocation, etc... Me? For the first time, I met Jo Ann - the person, not Mom - my mom - two very different people. Likewise, when I got involved in trying help Mom by helping Daddy, I started treating my father as a person, rather than as "Daddy" - again, two very different people. These are some of the frustrations I referenced in my previous message - how the relationships change with ALL people involved in the PWP's life - not just the PWP. ...and hey, just being here - I already KNOW we'd be great CGivers full-time - I'm pretty much counting on it and this is where we begin to earn our stripes! Did any of you see Maureen Regan on The Today Show this morning? She, of course was referencing the CGiving to her father with alzheimer's - but especially concentrating on the difficulties of CGiving - I missed the beginning of her interview (by Maria Shriver) but will try to access the written script online - Thanks again to all... Cari daughter of Dempsey-PWP (71/16+) & Jo Ann-CGiver