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Janet... I feel you're on point, with the exception of the 'fizzles and fogs and is gone." I see that issues when finally addressed DON'T fizzles and fog" and then somehow disappear from our consciousness, never or at least rarely to be heard from again. Rather, I believe once acknowledged, once aired., issues become much EASIER to address and therefore can be and ARE recalled with little of the original intense pain and passion. Therefore we're more at peace when we touch upon an issues that once caused the pit of our stomach to be knot at the very thought of them don't feel the.. Since the threat of emotional pain has been reduced to a manageable limit by it's repeated exposure, it becomes something that is almost SAFE to deal with because we know it so intimately. Barb Mallut [log in to unmask] -----Original Message----- From: janet paterson <[log in to unmask]> To: [log in to unmask] <[log in to unmask]> Date: Tuesday, May 30, 2000 9:39 AM Subject: hiding awareness? >hi all > >applying some of the benefit of 20-20 hindsight >it seems to me >that our current problems with 'awareness' of pd >on all sorts of levels >work medical home self >have some pretty strong roots in the concept of 'hiding' pd >on all sorts of levels >work medical home self >not the least of which >might be part and parcel >of personal acknowledgment and acceptance >of a profound change in our individual physical health >not >a matter of giving in and rolling over and playing dead >but >a matter of acknowledging and grieving the perceived losses >and then moving forward with it all > >in terms of my work identity >i thought the very worst thing that could happen to me was to >'go bankrupt' >but that turned out to be the right thing to do > >in terms of my youthful exuberance >i thought that the very worst thing that could happen to me was to >'have an illegitimate child' >but that turned out to be a joy > >in terms of my physical health >i thought that the very worst thing that could happen to me was to >'lose my independence' >i'm still working on this one, but the illusions are fading here too > >hiding anything out of perceived fear shame embarassment >only allows it to fester and strengthen >in the dark > >brought out into the light of day >[sometimes kicking and screaming, granted] >it fizzles and fogs >and is gone > > >janet > >janet paterson >53 now / 41 dx / 37 onset >613 256 8340 / PO Box 171 Almonte Ontario K0A 1A0 Canada >visit my website "a new voice" at: http://www.geocities.com/janet313/