WHAT'S YOUR NEW NAME? The following is allegedly an excerpt from a children's book, "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants", allegedly by Dav Pilkey: The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names... Use the first letter of your first name to determine your NEW first name: a = stinky b = lumpy c = buttercup d = gidget e = crusty f = greasy g = fluffy h = cheeseball i = chim-chim j = poopsie k = flunky l = booger m = pinky n = zippy o = goober p = doofus q = slimy r = loopy s = snotty t = falafel u = dorkey v = squeezit w = orville x = skipper y = dinky z = zsa-zsa Use the first letter of your last name to determine the FIRST HALF of your NEW last name: a = diaper b = toilet c = giggle d = bubble e = girdle f = barf g = lizard h = waffle i = cootie j = monkey k = potty l = liver m = banana n = rhino o = burger p = hamster q = toad r = gizzard s = pizza t = gerbil u = chicken v = pickle w = chuckle x = tofu y = gorilla z = stinker Use the last letter of your last name to determine the SECOND HALF of your NEW last name: a = head b = mouth c = face d = nose e = tush f = breath g = pants h = shorts i = lips j = honker k = butt l = brain m = tushie n = chunks o = hiney p = biscuits q = toes r = buns s = fanny t = sniffer u = sprinkles v = kisser w = squirt x =humperdinck y = brains z = juice Thus, for example, George Bush's new name is Fluffy Toiletshorts. Go figure! Hugs, from Poopsie Hamsterchunks janet paterson 53 now / 44 dx cd / 43 onset cd / 41 dx pd / 37 onset pd tel: 613 256 8340 url: "http://www.geocities.com/janet313/" email: "[log in to unmask]" smail: PO Box 171 Almonte Ontario K0A 1A0 Canada