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cross pollination from nick at the park place message board: In Reply to: >the future of this website ... posted by janet paterson on July 16, 19100 at 12:40:58: >i hope is not at risk. its listing has been deleted from the Open Directory >Project and i don't know why. i don't want to cause any upset to paige's family >or friends, but as i see it, suicide has to be talked about. hiding it [and >the feelings leading up to it] in shame will only let it perpetuate itself. >it is the fatal epidemic with no voice in the usa. which strikes me as doubly >tragic, since it is primarily the result of clinical depression, which is >curable. but which is undiagnosed in over two thirds of its victims. because >of toxic shame about admitting to 'emotional problems' or a 'mental disorder'. >i don't want to hear about any more parkies and suicide. do you? will we learn >anything from paige's experience? Janet, You make some important points. Suicide and the feelings that lead to it are most dangerous when we refuse to acknowledge that they exist as possibilities. It's only when we admit that suicidal feelings are normal when we're faced with what we perceive as inescapable adversity and that suicide is indeed an option that we can effectively reduce that danger. I know the pain, the anquished introspection, and the feelings of unrecoverable loss that come with a loved one's suicide. My brother, Joe, took his life just before his 21st birthday. My heart goes out to Paige's family. We ask ourselves how people so bright and so vital can do such a thing. The unimaginable pain and utter despair that allow a person to end their own life blinds them to any other option. They can't see through to the hope that exists in even the worst of situations. Joe and Paige acted in the midst of such despair. Maybe the lesson, and the legacy, is that Paige, who taught so many so much during her life, inadvertantly showed us that the pathway to suicide is often hidden and only by awareness and communication can we avert the danger of that option that leaves no other option. We don't prevent suicide by hiding it. It would be a shame to put an end to a vital part of Paige's work by closing this site because of our discomfort with the circumstances of her death. She deserves a better memorial.