From where I am in my head sucide could be a great relief. No more pretending. No more boards of ammeter to while they set there may not be in it. My wife seems to be enjoying herself every night. Solo but no join in. Damn hate my lot. Strangely enough I feel a sense of moral responsibility, my wife feels really bad when I shake. We're about 2km to the turnpike and I'm feeling so bad Unfortunately guns are hard to get so I'll have to do special like the hanging or the car. I had you fooled. There's no sense in pretending. I'll just keep on being a rather pathetic man. Pete