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> "There are bad times just around the corner,
> There are dark clouds traveling through the sky
> And it's no good whining
> About a silver lining
> For we know from experience that they won't roll by,
> With a scowl and a frown
> We'll keep our peckers down
> And prepare for depression and doom and dread,
> We're going to unpack our troubles from our old kitbag
> And wait until we drop down dead."
>
> Noel Coward, 1953
>
> ***************************************************************************
> Diagnostic criteria for NPD: Normal Person Disorder
>
> 1. A chronic feeling of normalness.
> 2. A tendency to bore others easily.
> 3. A nagging sense of constantly meeting one's goal.
> 4. Lack of difficulty getting organized.
> 5. Inability to be humorous.
> 6. Knowing how to count without forgetting what number you are up to.
> 7. An inability to be creative and intuitive, no seat of pants to fly by.
> 8. Highly stimulated by lectures, speeches, dead cockroaches and other
> normals.
> 9. An unbroken remote control.
> 10. A To-Do list which gets done.
> 11. A chronic interest in each or any of the following for more than a week:
> Job
> Relationship
> Schedule
> Patience
> Passing Grades
> Sex
> Normals
> 12. A methodical nature.
> 13. Affectionately known as "Bump on a log" or "Nytol Substitute"