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Ivan--I agree with Juanita about your characterization of nursing homes as death camps. My Mother just came home from six weeks in one for rehab and therapy after surgery to fix a broken hip. The nurses and CNAs couldn't have been any nicer or more caring. Do a little research and I'm sure you'll find that there is a facility in your area that will meet your needs and provide a good place for you to live--if it should come to that--and a caring staff who will be there when you need them. A suggestion, look around and see if any of your friends have loved ones in a nursing home, then ask if you can visit with them. I know the thought of leaving your home is painful, but is it any better constantly worrying about care givers who leave you stranded or when the next tax bill is going to show up or whether or not you'll be alone the next time you have a freezing episode? I would hate to have had to leave Mom there indefinitely because I would miss her terribly, but I know she would have been well cared for. Think about it some more, Ivan. It may not be your ideal solution to your problems, but with some checking into the homes in your are and talking to friends about the care their loved ones get, you might find someplace that will meet your needs and let you live comfortably and with a lot less worry and anxiety. IMHO, Eleanor