for once i am in agreement with someone on a religious/philosophical issue. but i think, if we go back to the biblicl verse which i think is the basis for this view point (lev 19:18) G-d is telling us to 'love thy neighbour as thyself" the important thing is to remember the last two words. we are not told to 'love thy neighbour at the expence of t;hyself" but "as thyself" thus implying that we have to love ourselves - ie have self respect and selfesteem, and care for our owhn well being, in order to be able to "love thy neighbour" hilary blue Charles E Murray wrote: > > David, > > You said, in part: "Love can be felt, but its not a feeling. Love is > demonstrated, > and is learned best by self sacrifice." > > I agreed with every word of your share, except the word "sacrifice." The > man who told the fish story described love as "action," which he in turn > defined as "doing things for God's kids for free and for fun." > > If self sacrifice is intended to mean becoming oblivious to self in > service, OK, but most of us understand that word to connote something > unpleasant, but moral or noble. In short, for me it has always been > associated with "should" and guilt, two words that are foreign to my > notion of what love is and does. > > You quoted your instructor as saying, "Love is not a feeling, its a > choice" "An unselfish choice motivated by > willing the Highest, and best for another." > > This, in my view, is part of the "experience" of love, which combines > "choice" and "action," both of which are the inevitable result when we > let go of guilt and find a place of OKness with self, God and others. > Janet was saying, I believe, that our natural heritage is love because we > were created as love by Love. Our journey here is to transcend the ego's > focus on guilt and fear and return to that natural heritage. > > This may seem overly thought centered to one who emphasized action, but > before I could perform even one unselfish act in a state of mind > motivated by willing the Highest, and the best for another, I had to > clean my personal mental house, let go of self guilt and with it your > guilt, and only then was I able to take the tiniest steps with the > motivation you describe. > > Love > Chuck