BERNIE'S BANTER………..Bernardo, pub.press 10/24
You're Undecided Now,
So What are you gonna do ?.
One of the major topics we have been deluged with in this upcoming election
is the plight of the "Undecided".
This is a large percentage of the electorate which has as of this late date
not yet decided whom to support. Most experts claim this group is
substantial and may very well decide the ultimate fate of the candidates.
Planet Uncertain
One wonders which planet these up in the air, ambivalent folks inhabit.
After three lengthy debates, and many campaign speeches
,the views and th disagreements of the two major candidates are
well known. Gore and Bush are far apart on many, many subjects.
It is assumed that most individuals over 18 know how they stand on issues,
or which point of view they have, liberal or conservative.
On second thought, that is wishful thinking, since an expert poller named
Jay Leno has shown over and over again ,that most of the young have no idea
of who their congressman, or senator are, and are even unsure of which is
our nation's capital.
Let's analyze further the hesitants who are holding the nation guessing
which way they will go as they enter the voting booth.
Causes and Effects of Vacillation
1.The first possibility is that these people do not read a daily newspaper,
watch TV news broadcast, or ever read anything beyond Stop signs. In
non-book reading they have a friend in one of the candidates.
2.The second is that most of this group is rather fuzzy when it comes to
serious thinking or decision making.
3. The third is that the undecided are cleverly keeping themselves in the
limelight , getting more than their 15 minutes of notoriety.
4. The fourth may be that they are afraid to voice their opinion lest
members of one party or another will puncture their tires, or sequester
their dog.
5. There's the fifth possibility that many undecided will forget to vote
altogether.
Fortunately for New York, the Subway Series has come along, and
displaced for a week or so the Presidential campaigning from the
headlines.
Memoirs of a Loser, Pt. I
(from notes found in the attic)
Today I received a notice from the cemetery raising its fees due to "the
cost of living".
I was swimming in the ocean wondering how much deeper it would be without
sponges.
Gravity is wonderful. Without it dead birds would stay up there.
Shirley was my first love. She wanted to go to the drive-in but I didn't
have
a car. So we took at taxi. Luckily I had the $120.00 cab fare.
My answering machine answers calls with a busy signal.
I love skylights. I put one in my bedroom but the tenants above are furious.
==================================
read our "Bernie's Banter" columns on:
http://pages.prodigy.net/nursemarilyn
====================================
>To: [log in to unmask]
>Subject: Fwd: back at you: smile
>Date: Tue, 24 Oct 2000 12:32:22 -0700
>
>>From: [log in to unmask]
>>Subject: back at you: smile
>>To: "Bernard Barber,Ph.D." <[log in to unmask]>
>>Date: Tue, 24 Oct 2000 10:14:48 -0500
>>X-MIMETrack: Serialize by Router on AA1MTA/Hennepin(Release 5.0.5
>>|September 22, 2000) at
>> 10/24/2000 10:15:32 AM
>>
>>
>>
>>DR. SEUSS EXPLAINS COMPUTERS
>> >
>> If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and
>> the bus is interrupted as a very last resort, and the
>> address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
>> then the socket packet pocket has an error to
>> report.
>> >
>> If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
>> and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the
>> trash, and your data is corrupted 'cause the index
>> doesn't hash, then your situation's
>> hopeless and your system's gonna crash!
>> >
>> If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
>> says the network is connected to the button on your
>> mouse, but your packets want to tunnel on another
>> protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer
>> down the hall, and your screen is all distorted by the
>> side effects of gauss, so your icons in the window are
>> as wavy as a souse, then you may as well reboot, and
>> go out with a bang, because as sure as I'm a
>> poet, the sucker's gonna hang!
>> >
>> When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy on the
>> disk, and the microcode instructions cause unnecessary
>> risk, then you have to flash your memory, and you'll
>> want to RAM your ROM. Quickly turn off the
>> computer and be sure to tell your mom.
>>--
>>Kjell Stenberg
>>Informational Systems Intern
>>Minnesotans for an Energy Efficient Economy
>>
>>http://www.me3.org
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