sandy I am sorry if I in any way am responsible for your decision to leave the list. I was upset yesterday with bob finks post intimating racial overtones that my *spade is a spade * saying did not have nor intend. I have researched its origins and found it predated any knowledge of american slang however disgusting that is to me too. It came out of england with those who migrated from Great Britian. I tried to say this as nicely as I could as the comment was made to a new aussie friend that I have. I would never intentionally hurt anyone nor would I insult anyone on list if I had any choice. I tried to soothe tempers on the list so many times especially when it came to some of janets damage over the past year. I have to admit I didnt like her, nor the influence she had to affect adversely those who were not as vocal as I *could* be. You however, are not manipulative and have no hidden agenda. You offer so much to all, a generous nature, a sweet disposition, and a tenacity that we all should aspire to. I will not question your decision anymore than I would any thinking adult. I would hope that we do not lose contact my friend-- if I still am one that is? I would hate to lose the light that you have brought onto the list when there has been so much darkness so often too.