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Marco, you have come to the right place to find online support. How old are you? Have you tried discussing this with your spouse? Perhaps if you printed some of the posts that might express some of your needs . Leave the material where she cannot miss them. Have you spoken to your physician regarding your circumstances? Stress is certainly not good for your illness. I can hear the pain you are over what you seem to be experiencing. All I can offer is a warm hug. Please write a post anytime.This list is meant to help with support, information and a forum to vent. Juanita CG for George 74/71/64