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I've been hanging on at my job in book publishing but find it increasingly difficult if not impossible to manage an 8-hour day at the office any more. I'm 50 years old. Our organization has a private disability insurance policy--the 60% of salary at the time of disability kind of policy--for which I am grateful. I am about to take the first step, cutting back to 80% of full-time, with disability filling in the lost income after a waiting period. It's a difficult step, but necessary. I am optimistic that this will be more manageable at least for a while. I work for a very supportive employer, but this feeling of no longer being able to contribute as much as colleagues or to work the extra time where needed or even to maintain the level of competence I had two years ago is not a good feeling to have. I like my job. My medications keep symptoms more or less at bay, except fatigue, and I'm not sure where the muddle-headedness comes from. But I just wear out, like the stuffing has been knocked out of me. Co-workers tell me I "look good." This is always nice to hear, but there is the lingering sense of the unspoken "...so why can't you just buck up?" Hey, I'm lucky compared to many, and will count my blessings as soon as I get done complaining. Also, I wanted to say how impressed I am with the new book, "When Parkinson's Strikes Early," a project accomplished by members of this list. I'm proud to be included in this publication. However, I am fighting the sense that "it's all been said," now that we have a book full of insightful commentary on the Parkinson's journey by those travelling along the path. The same things will and should continue to be said and shared by all of us. Maybe we need to repeat ourselves, because the same stuff keeps coming up again and again. All those stories are moments in time. Each new moment brings a new challenge--let's keep writing about those and helping one another out. Take care, Rick 50 years old, dx 1997 ---------------------------------------------------------------------- To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: mailto:[log in to unmask] In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn