joan and rita... thank you both for your honest and calm explanations. after several days of this important discussion with some degree of need to one up or correct each other, you are both welcome additions. i agree with those who have stated we need to focus our energy on how to get through this and move forward as best we can. i also agree we need to let off steam and share our frustrations. i'm just grateful when we can take a moment to re-read our words before hitting send and skip the semantics and try not to second guess each other. if we are unclear about what someone means, let's ask. we don't have to agree on everything but we don't need to give each other any extra grief. cheers to the two of you who said things so well. maxine ---------------------------------------------------------------------- To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: mailto:[log in to unmask] In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn