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Tom, Did you see the following, somewhat similar theme, from last month? It launched a thread which ran for several days and bought up a few suggestions which nust be available through archives. Nancy Porter >Background: I was dx 9 years ago.....I do not have dyskinesia......my tremor >is generally masked by meds.....I do have facial masking.......it is often >very very tiring for me to speak.......gait is bothersome but on short >distances (curb to door) I may appear to do ok.....I never walk a block >without a cane.....I do a great 2 hour mile......So in general, you get the >picture that I do not "present" with the noticeable challenges of >movement.......when I am off I have stiffness, not extra movement. (might >add that my "good on time" is about 4-5 hours total during a 24 hour >period.....so my effort to appear at a meeting/gathering, work in my yard >etc.....is a carefully planned an orchestrated situation). > >Question is: How do you respond to a medical professional who says......you >are doing great.....or you don't appear to have any challenges. > >Or: How do you respond to the acquaintance who cornered you at a meeting, in >your yard, or wherever......who says......"but you don't have any problems, >you look great". > >Or: (when masking is grasping hold for the day!!).......Are you tired? Why >don't you smile? Are we boring you? Get with us today! or something >similar. > >(other than those situations where the comment is made in passing and they >don't expect an answer). > >I have this problem..with medical professionals/allied health people....I >generally feel that my credibility has been challenged...would you believe >anything I say...you have now put me on the defensive. > >I have several "friends" who seem to pursue this line of questioning about my >"challenges" in the past year......who would not let up on this line of >questioning/ >comments. > >I find that I am now consciously avoiding these people and >situations.....because I do feel challenged by these comments. I do dread >spending the energy and make the sacrifices of good time to go out...... > >I don't want/expect sympathy............but I do resent being put on the >spot. > >Are you disturbed when this happens to you? How do you tactfully (or >untactfully!!) respond? > >Rita Weeks 57/1 Tom mccreary wrote, >Actually to whom it may apply, >Having recetly been given the task of recording diifferent stations in my >life i would llke to solicit some feedback. I am wrsetling with caoturing >my thoughts regarding my future. To yhose that are still at a point of >inependence wit most if ot all actiiviyies, how would you expppress your >outlook on your fiture whnen you kow what is in the decck youhold but >others, who see you only when medicated, think yo can work a fll day >andkeep up wth the old gang. Is it just me who caant see a silver lining >here? This hypotetical is primariy focusing on hubamnds and fathers who >get their sense of worth from their contributioons made to their families >and their communities and their legacy they will leave behind. This is >not without its appliation to women in their myriad of roles. >At 49 dx at 40 and a aving been a sucessful custom home designer, I am >strugggling with this because it is forcing me to take a hard look at and >even to forecast and compose my thoughts regarding where i will be at >periodic intervals. This is forcing me to have to consider some things i >had been denying and not talikng about. My symtoms are mild yet and >acquaintances cant figure out why i am not working ful time. If you can >share with me what sort of experience wth either your own optimism or the >sort of pesrpective those around you have about you not cloccking in 8 to >5 i would appreciate it. And if you prefer, you can send it to me directly >and not get into confessions on the list. > >tom at [log in to unmask] > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: mailto:[log in to unmask] In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn