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BAD DAY FROM THE START

Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife.
Tearfully, she explained, "It's the druggist. He insulted me terribly this
morning on the phone."

Immediately the husband drove downtown to confront the druggist and demand
an apology.

Before he could say more than a word or two, the druggist told him, "Now, just a
minute, listen to my side of it.

This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up.  I went
without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I locked the
house with both house and car keys inside. I had to break a window to get my
keys.

Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Later, when I was
about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire.

When I finally got to the store there was a bunch of people waiting for me to
open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, and all the
time the darn phone was ringing off the hook."

He continued, "Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register
drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I got down on my
hands and knees to pick up the nickels; the phone was still ringing. When I came
up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer which made me stagger back against
a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it, half of them hit the floor and
broke.

Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to
answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer.

And believe me Mister, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her!"

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