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The source of this article is the Dallas Morning News: http://tinyurl.com/4u2es Caregivers: Isolation can be overwhelming 06:15 PM CST on Monday, December 6, 2004 By BILL MARVELStaff Writer / The Dallas Morning News The daughter who cares for her aging mother. The wife who spends her day at the bedside of a husband paralyzed by a stroke. The brother-in-law who drops in on his ailing mother-in-law to fix her lunch, to sort through her mail, to clean and tidy up and to bring news of the outside world. Some would call them saints. Suzanne Mintz calls them caregivers. Ms. Mintz is co-founder and president of the National Family Caregivers Association, a grass-roots support and advocacy organization. The group has joined with the National Alliance for Care- giving to make both the public and caregivers themselves aware of their contribution and needs. "We're not saints," says Ms. Mintz, whose husband's multiple sclerosis was diagnosed in 1974. "We are people whom life has put in a difficult place, and we're working through it." According to Ms. Mintz, the almost 50 million Americans who care for an aging or chronically ill loved one save the U.S. health care system $257 billion a year. They could exercise enormous political clout if they chose, she says. The trouble is, most of them don't think of themselves as caregivers. "People think they're just doing the normal thing you do for your family. And that may be true at the beginning stages. But as you get into personal care, it's much harder – helping somebody get in and out of bed, helping them go to bathroom." The typical caregiver is a woman in her mid-40s caring for her mother but not living with her, she says. But husbands, sons and brothers also provide care, and many also hold down full- and part-time jobs. More people these days are ending up as caregivers, she says, because more people end up needing care. "Whoever lived this long? Cancer used to be considered a terminal illness. Today it's considered a chronic illness. People didn't live clear across the country in the old days. We didn't have a health care system that was making people leave the hospital after two days. "All this is putting greater pressure on families. The isolation can be overwhelming." It was this sense of isolation that moved Ms. Mintz to found the association, she says. "A friend and I went to the beach for a respite weekend. She was caring for her mom, who had Parkinson's. We had never spoken about caregiving, but that weekend we opened up to each other. We discovered we were dealing with a lot of the same stuff. We recognized there was nothing out there for us. Nobody ever asked, 'How are you doing?' We decided we were going to try to do something." They started with a newsletter and a small office in Ms. Mintz's basement in Kensington, Md. "Now we're 11 years old," she says, proudly. What do caregivers need? Chiefly respite, she says. "Why should we think people who have a job caring for loved ones who are ill don't need a break? The stress of caregiving is strong. If you don't get relief, you're going to blow up." Studies show that the stresses of caregiving take a toll on the immune system, she says. Older caregivers have a higher death rate. "We need a better system of helping people get a break, one that's easy to access and highly affordable." Mostly, she would like to see caregivers become more aware of their own strengths and limitations. The holiday season is a good time to recognize caregivers, Ms. Mintz says, because of visits and family get-togethers. "Folks may be going home to see Mom and Dad, and they may notice something is not altogether right. The house is more disheveled, bills are piling up. Your antenna should go up. "All of us will end up caregivers, sooner or later." E-mail [log in to unmask] RESOURCES For more information and help, the Caregivers Association and Caregiving Alliance have created a Web site: www.familycaregiving101.org. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: mailto:[log in to unmask] In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn