Dear Nancy, Is your son willing to be cloned? David >From: nm <[log in to unmask]> >Reply-To: Parkinson's Information Exchange Network ><[log in to unmask]> >To: [log in to unmask] >Subject: Re: On being defined by our name/kids adapting and our loosing >them to adulthood and loosing ourselves to disease while not giving >in but accepting change >Date: Sun, 11 Jun 2006 06:11:50 -0700 > >well I must have one heck of a kid! although he is not perfect, he is now >in his early 20's and in med school. I pray I get to see him graduate and >finish his residency. >My husband and I couldn't wait until our son was 16 because that way he >could drive to and from school, the grocery store, the ER and such places. >His best friends father was a physician who I am sure probably spoke to him >at times about patients and their lives. His teachers also did the same. U >see I stop driving at age 36 or so. I couldn't drive because I would >constantly pass out. My husband thght I should drive short distances but I >didn't want to kill anyone while driving. >Our son is caring and when he was applying to college I explained that he >needed to enjoy life like a regular kid. He explained to me that to him his >life was normal and whatever anyone experiences as their life is normal to >them. He went to UR and ended up a very mature young man to this day. I >have listened to kids his age and I think perhaps it isn't that they are >selfish , but they may think of a belief that isn't our belief thus deemed >selfish or wrong. >This child has taken me to the ER, doc appts., movies, dinner, ect. The 3 >of us have had so much fun as well as turbulent times, however, to see him >fulfill his dream makes us very happy. NO I didn't tell him to become a >doctor. No one in the family is an MD. He watched the adults in his life >which happened to be mostly doctors, nurses, teachers, custodians, >basically medical and school personal. >WHat gets us upset when adults assume that all teens are alike. One >medical school administrator had the nerve to ask our son if he volunteered >at a hospital or something like that. community service hours. I thght. >jeezszzeee, he had 3 jobs as a junior, took care of his mom, help make sure >the house was care for and bills were paid on time, cooked dinner, did the >wash, shared the grocery shoppping, took some college level courses while >going to prep school and ur asking did he volunteer? He would leave at 7 AM >and get home at 6PM , cook, cleanup, do homework , blah blah. His senior >year would go back to school to work on audio or go to work, and then get >home at midnight (3 months). I am glad he didn't go to that med. school. I >don't want that type of an adult mentoring a future doctor- A cookie molded >approach I thght. > >My point is don't give up on ur teens. U will find they understand more >than u think. They know what it feels like to feel as if noone is listening >or be on a restrict schedule set by someone else. I guess the feeling of >the lost of control over their lives and trying to find what their new role >in life is. > >nancy m/ohio >---- Beverly Bashe <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > > Those are wise words, David. > > > > Your comment, "...they don't understand illness," is very appropriate. >It > > reminds me of a story. > > > > Years ago, a friend of mine, Anne Marie, went to the hospital after > > suffering a relapse of breast cancer. She didn't want to tell her 4 >teenage > > children (3 girls, 1 boy), fearing that she'd make them worry. Anne >Marie > > was the ultimate mother. The children were musical geniuses. Anne >Marie > > used to take them on the train into Manhattan at 5:30 a.m. each day to >go to > > the Manhattan School of Music. She was totally devoted to them. When >she > > realized that the travel time was inhibiting their friendships, she >brought > > them to the private school that I was teaching at in our home town. >Anne > > Marie, even though she was in pain and getting no help from her doctors, > > volunteered as an aide at the school, including in my kindergarten >class, so > > that the 4 children could go there at a reduced tuition. She was one of >the > > dearest people in the world, even tempered, sweet, intelligent, > > articulate...I really can't say enough about her. On Saturday, she'd >bring > > the kids back into Manhattan for music lessons. > > > > When she went to the hospital, I would see her every day after school. >She > > asked me what to say to the children, because her heart was breaking . >I > > told her that she must, absolutely tell them the truth and give them a > > chance to deal with it. I also said that no matter what she would say >to > > them, their imaginations would have been making it worse. She followed >my > > advice, brought them in the next day, told them everything...and you > > wouldn't believe what they said to her: "Oh, is that the problem? We > > thought you didn't love us anymore." > > > > After all she'd done for them, been to them, shown them her love, this >was > > what they'd collectively come up with. Can you imagine??? Anne Marie >was > > stunned, as was I when she phoned and told me of their conversation. >This > > taught me a lot...especially not to second guess what kids were >thinking, > > because it probably would not be what actually was in their minds! > > > > As to your advice to let him be "the bad guy," excellent! My goodness, > > David, you're "right on," in my humble opinion. > > > > Bev cg David 70/59/31??? > > ----- Original Message ----- > > From: "DAVID LEWIN" <[log in to unmask]> > > To: <[log in to unmask]> > > Sent: Friday, June 09, 2006 10:01 AM > > Subject: Re: On being defined by our name > > > > > > > Dear Elizabeth, > > > There is no reason to panic. Living with a teenager is usually very > > > stressful. Right now you should think about taking care of yourself. >I > > > am > > > a parent of several teenagers and I too had the shock of my wife >driving > > > me > > > away and trying to turn my children against me. Teenagers are very > > > self-absorbed, they don't want to be caretakers, they are afraid of > > > illness, > > > they do not understand illness. They just want to have fun. As my > > > sixteen > > > year old son said, "Your illness is ruining my childhood." If your > > > daughter > > > wants to live with her father, don't fight her on this. You say you >live > > > close to your ex-husband. Good. Let him be the one who fights with >her > > > when she comes home at 2 o'clock in the morning. Let your husband be >the > > > one who is upset when she takes the car. Be the refuge for your >daughter > > > when she rebels against his authority. Let him be la bete noire. Look >to > > > your future and your needs. She'll come back to you when she's older >and > > > wiser. > > > David > > > > > >>From: El Che <[log in to unmask]> > > >>Reply-To: Parkinson's Information Exchange Network > > >><[log in to unmask]> > > >>To: [log in to unmask] > > >>Subject: Re: On being defined by our name > > >>Date: Fri, 9 Jun 2006 04:05:35 -0400 > > >> > > >>Hello, > > >> > > >>I am more afraid about the new ways of speaking about PD as a >psychologic > > >>disease or addiction symptoms resulting of agonist effects... After >years > > >>of studying "physical symptoms" the new trends seems to look on the >size > > >>of > > >>"psychological effects" or in a view with Parkinson Disease is a >"demence" > > >>as some people say in France. I just come back in Canada (Quebec) >from a > > >>trip in my family in France and I could tell you that people with PD >are > > >>not > > >>open like us in North America to tell openely they have PD. Because >the > > >>diseases relatives to a brain disorder is viewing as "suspect" and it >is > > >>sometime a shame in a family to have one person having that. It's >almost > > >>like MST diseases...Disease from my point of view is not a bad word... >a > > >>disease, in particular with physical symptoms like mouvment disorders >is > > >>a > > >>"clean disease" because it is not something "bad" that you did to >have it > > >>(ex. AIDS should be more problematic to announced it around a table in >a > > >>business lunch or at work. And please, I understand and compatise >with > > >>people who had any diseases, I just took AIDS as an example to make a > > >>point: > > >> disease that we could speak about and, not be proud to have it of > > >>course, > > >>but not be ashamed too. > > >> > > >>Until now I was very open to talk about PD around me but now I begin >to > > >>feel > > >>more nervous, anxious... > > >> > > >>My personal preoccupation is people using PD effects on humor or even >not > > >>be > > >>a "stable person because you have tremor and in a nervous situation >you > > >>are > > >>shaking more and more"...to destroy the confidence in the PD person... >as > > >>I > > >>recently divorced, my ex-husband still plays with the words about "my >PD > > >>and > > >>volatility effects" and my daugther, who was very close to me younger, >is > > >>now closer to him as he is a very stable person ! I don't know >exactly to > > >>explain me but I hope you could understand that I am afraid to lost my > > >>daugther.... I am a good mother and still coult take care on her.... >but > > >>they began together lifing about somes mistakes I should make... and >after > > >>that said some words, but still in a joking way, about my driving way >(I > > >>"take" sometime the corner to close and a wheel jump a little bit on >the > > >>sideway) but I am driving prudently and I am not a "public >danger"....but > > >>as my daugther became "a little bit afraid to be in my car", she >prefered > > >>taking the bus or having his father taking her....inch by inch, day by > > >>day, > > >>my ex-husband maid some points and I am not in a good position to >fight > > >>with > > >>him. > > >> > > >>The worst for me now is that they told me recently that maybe next >year, > > >>as > > >>she has now 14 years old, she could decide to live full time in his >house. > > >>Legally divorced just last december, we had the "garde partagée" >which is > > >>one week for her to be with me, one week with him. We live closer and > > >>even > > >>if it is not the best way of living, I could not imagine my life >without > > >>ma > > >>daugther at home, even if she is in a bad mood. > > >> > > >>So, I do not want to cry on my condition but I needed to tell that... >With > > >>the hope to have some understanding in that place, maybe some of you >had > > >>passed by a same way and tell me or give me some hints to do or things >to > > >>avoid. > > >> > > >>Thanks anyway for having reading me until the end :-) > > >> > > >>Elisabeth > > >> > > >>_________________________________________________________________ > > >>Vous cherchez une maison? Visitez Sympatico / MSN Immobilier > > >>http://mamaison.sympatico.msn.ca/Immobilier > > >> > > >>---------------------------------------------------------------------- > > >>To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: > > >>mailto:[log in to unmask] > > >>In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn > > > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > > > To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: > > > mailto:[log in to unmask] > > > In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > > To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: >mailto:[log in to unmask] > > In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn > >---------------------------------------------------------------------- >To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: >mailto:[log in to unmask] >In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn ---------------------------------------------------------------------- To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: mailto:[log in to unmask] In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn