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Bush's morals not in my majority Esteemed Yale grad and international masseur President Bush returned from his duties as G-8 Summit headliner to his fulltime job as commander in chief, shaman, reverend and head weenie roaster for these United States. After six long years of steady, unwavering, well, almost unwavering ... um, sort of steady, well, at least if you don't count that time he said the war in Iraq was "over," then landed on an aircraft carrier to show his military might, then it turned out that the war wasn't over and he had to be rushed to several military school graduations whereupon he pulled quarters from behind the ears' of recruits, in hopes of convincing them that al-Qaida could be destroyed with wishful thinking and magic. Anyway, unless you count stuff like that, he's been pretty steady and hard at work. After reaching the highest level of his Tom Clancy Splinter Cell video game -- with a little help from Donald Rumsfeld -- Bush paused the game long enough to veto federally funded embryonic stem-cell research. Because President Bush maintains a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to common sense, no additional embryonic stem-cell research will receive federal dollars. A few states, such as California and New Jersey, are working to create state-funded embryonic stem-cell research grants. Meanwhile, Time reports that enterprising foreigners, such as Singapore's Phillip Yeo, mine the rich scientific "mind fields," recruiting our top researchers to study at his country's 2 million-square-foot facility, Biopolis, where stem-cell research is well-funded and encouraged. A "moral" decision. Agree or disagree with the veto, cut the guy some slack. He doesn't get to make many moral decisions, as his policies have proven. The National Institutes of Health's budget for the administration of federal funding is $28.6 billion. Human non-embryonic stem-cell research will receive about $200 million of the NIH pie, but what scientists want a crack at are the leftovers from more than 400,000 frozen embryos cooling in freezers across the country. Since private funds pay only a fraction of research costs, further testing of the potential of embryonic stem cells requires federal aid. Every time a reproductive clinic clears its shelves of frozen embryos, many research scientists wince at the lost potential to find cures for cancer, diabetes and numerous other diseases. President Bush, who has most certainly destroyed the Axis of Evil -- I know he did because he said he would -- is an equally reliable source when it comes to his rationale for aborting stem-cell research. Again, I gotta give the guy some credit. It takes a special person in the new millennium willing to fear science and its collision with religion with the same fervor as past societies. It was that kind of fear that inspired 19th century romanticist Mary Shelley to write Frankenstein. Were she alive today, could "Bushenstein" be far behind? Bush says his decision was "moral." Copernicus faced "moral" opposition, too. Had the 16th century scientist stalled his research, perhaps religious conservatives would still be trying to convince us that the Earth is the center of the universe and Inquisitions are "great for the economy." Thank God time travel is, as yet, another fiction. Otherwise, President Bush might be tempted to further divert attention away from how well he has stabilized the Middle East and go for another photo op, only this time traveling back in time wielding his mediocre intellect like Attila invading Constantinople. Time Travel News Service: PARIS -- Madame Marie Curie ends promising research into radium. President Bush says present-day X-ray machines are immoral. Radiologists will now use flashlights and a series of mirrors to see "inside" patients. WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Bush returns from past to proclaim Sir Isaac Newton an instrument of Satan. Gravity no longer exists. THE '60s -- In a stunning breach of the time continuum, President Bush has vetoed the '60s, the sexual revolution and, most importantly, the birth control pill. Ladies, just say "no." Sherri Winston can be reached at 954-356-4476 or [log in to unmask] ---------------------------------------------------------------------- To sign-off Parkinsn send a message to: mailto:[log in to unmask] In the body of the message put: signoff parkinsn