I am much taken with all the recent discussion about sensitivity, about
who should know what and when. There is no simple answer. Bad news is just
plain bad news. Always helpful, Mark Twain tells us about one who was skilled
in
Breaking It Gently
"Yes, I remember that anecdote," the Sunday school superintendent said,
with the old pathos in his voice and the old sad look in his eyes. "It was
about a simple creature named Higgins that used to haul rock for old Maltby.
When the lamented Judge Bagely tripped and fell down the court-house stairs and
broke his neck, it was a great question how to break the news to poor Mrs.
Bagely. But finally the body was put into Higgins's wagon and he was instructed
to take it to Mrs. B., but to be very guarded and discreet in his language, and
not break the news to her at once, but to do it gradually and gently. When
Higgins got there with his sad freight, he shouted until Mrs. Bagely came to the
door. Then he said:
"Does the widder Bagely live here?"
"The widow Bagely? No, Sir!"
"I bet she does. But have it your way. Well does Judge Bagely live
here?"
"Yes, Judge Bagely lives here."
"I bet he don't. But never mind - it ain't for me to contradict. Is the
Judge in?"
"No, not at present."
"I jest expected as much. Because you know - take hold o' suthin, mum,
for I'm a-going to make a little communication, and I reckon maybe it'll jar you
some. There's been an accident, mum. I've got the old Judge curled up out here
in the wagon - and when you see him you'll acknowledge, yourself, that an
inquest is about the only thing that could be a comfort to him!"
June 1870
[Mark Twain. Miscellany, 1852-1890. Library of America, p.398]
George Andes : 13 years and counting
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