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Dear Mary Manfredi, You wrote: >Ten years ago I was writing everything in a diary and drawing sine curves,etc >to fit the entries. After a lapse of five years or so, I came across the >data. >My comments ran something like this: > "Jeepers !, Thank God I don't have THAT anymore > ... How did I ever manage to get through the day???... > I couldn't have been that sad....Where did I find the time to write > all this stuff ?" That little diary made my day. I've learned to take it > as it comes. Thanks so much for your notes on your diary. I think I'm experiencing something similar to what you described. You're smart to have put it in writing. At least I have some mental snapshots of that dark, dark time just before and just after the diagnosis. It's such a paradox. We all seem to assume that having a chronic, progressive disease would by definition mean that with every passing year, we'd just have to feel worse. But the jolt of the diagnosis required me to put other aspects of my life in perspective and "shape up or ship out." This is really no different than what my brothers both went through when they learned about their heart diseases, also when they were in their 40's. They had to switch gears quickly, making some drastic lifestyle changes. When I compliment them on it, they say that they really had no choice. Always unspoken is the "S" word. It's not an alternative, especially while we have kids who seem to still need us and while we have "miles to go before" we "sleep". Mary Yost