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Bruce.... there's a lot of us single Parkies "out there." I've been single for 13 years, and to tell you the truth, I'd rather be alone, with all it implies, than to marry or be in a relationship because of *fear* of being alone in later years with a chronic disease...OR just to "settle." As it happens, I date alot, and it's a confirmation of the positive feelings I have about myself (and to heck with them few negatives... like PD) <rueful smile>, yet I *am* lonely. I'm lonely for the warmth and the intimacy.. both the emotional and physical.. which comes with being a part of a couple. Still, m'friend, I'd rather face the future with the possibility of being alone then stuck in a loveless marriage, lonelier WITH a partner than without. (Been there, and after 20 years, got out. THAT was *L O N E L Y*) I don't have any great alternatives to suggest to you... But I presumed from reading your message that you've not been married before (a rebuttable presumption, I know). I felt a need to comment 'cause I've been both married for a long period of time AND single for a long time, and felt the need to remind you that old cliche "the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence," has it's foundation in the truth. I suggest MAKE the most of NOW... everyday of the week (which you may already do, and in that case, just delete this puppy). Squeeze the maximum amount of pleasure and enjoyment (a possible redundancy, but who cares). If ya can't take giant steps toward good times and good things, take smaller steps. But try to include as many things that you hold precious in to the days and weeks as you can. Remind yourself to not only be strong, but to be positive... This can make the difference between merely exsting, or really living. It's not the partner who'd bring you happiness... the seeds to that are already there within you. I wish you all those good things that you wish for yourself... G'luck on finding that "Kristen." Errrr... getting off my soapbox... Barb Mallut ([log in to unmask] ---------- From: Parkinson's Disease - Information Exchange Network on behalf of Bruce Anderson Sent: Friday, March 08, 1996 10:32 PM To: Multiple recipients of list PARKINSN Subject: Loss of Independence or of Mobility? ... Toward the end I was mumbling about giving up and dying. What pulled me out of it? Two things. Kristen, my wife, said she needed me. Second, there is this part of me that just won't let me quit. This part of me just won't let me stop trying. So I'm still in there swinging. I running on a few less cylinders but I'm still functioning. Perhaps, maybe, there is indeed more than one reason for continuing to try. Kristen, cats, friends, and things I can still do. So I'm still here. ... I wonder what this means for those of us without a "Kristen." And I wonder what "caregivers are really ESSENTIAL" means for us single Parkies. I know that it does not mean to go to support groups where everyone else has a partner, or so it always seems. I think I know what it does mean. (Did Mike Altman do anything else that was famous?) I'm not there yet, not (I hope) by a long shot. But I think of those that are, and of those that will be. I'm still hoping for a "Kristen!" Still hoping... Bruce