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People with Parkinson's Disease may have different symptoms and medicinal intake/side-effects, but the experience of being "off", I feel, is an all-too familiar sensation (when PD reminds you of how zombie-like and oh-so-slow you are without your meds, this is known as being "off"). Those of you without PD trying to imagine what life is like for those of us living with this disease will hopefully be educated. Those familiar with this experience will hopefully experience a form of kinship in the strange world of being "off" as seen through my words. YOU KNOW YOU'RE REALLY "OFF" WHEN: * The mention of "childproof caps" brings a disconcerting feeling * You realize that you are a much better listener than you'd ever imagined * You closely identify with the pink Eveready-bunny's predicament * Your complete lack of facial expression makes you nostalgic for dyskinetic grimaces * The thought of "adult diapers" no longer seems silly * Sweatpants have become a fixture in your choice of daily attire * You struggle for many minutes trying to get your hand in your pocket and grab your house-keys only to discover that your hand has grown to immense proportions and seems to be stuck there indefinitely * The concept of solid food held stationary in front of your face seems much more reasonable than food that needs to be scooped, picked up, and/or cut * You no longer feel hesitant handing your wallet to sales people and watching as they make change and return it to you * You empty your pockets at the end of the day and set aside all the accumulated crumpled paper-money to put back in your wallet * People throughout the course of the day ask: "Do you need some help with that?" in response to an ever-increasing number of situations * Entering a phone-number on a push-button telephone seems a never-ending challenge * You find yourself trying to get the best "leverage" to tear a check out of the checkbook * Hardback books feel as heavy as barbells and the process of turning pages reminds you of "pushing a rock uphill" * You get your mail and then stare helplessly at it knowing the contents will need to remain a mystery till your meds kick in * You wonder if you'll ever switch "on" again The list above is not the definitive list for all PD-surfers (this phrase sounds more adventuresome and life-giving than the phrase "sufferers") I hope my descriptions made you think of how it's an individual's daily choice in how they deal with the many facets of PD. The fact that there "is" a choice makes dealing with PD easier for me. -David Boots