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>From the 'Dick E. Bird News' published bimonthly in Acme, Mich, and billed as the 'largest underfinanced, overextended newspaper in the world. ... some 'Magpie Jokes' (from C&EN, 15 Apr. 1996) Q. What did the duck say when it fell in love with the parrot? A. Quacker wants a Polly. Q. Where do birds put their nests for safekeeping? A. In a branch bank. Q. What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook? A. Wet feet. Q. Where is the ocean deepest? A. On the bottom. Q. What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? A. Its Christmas, Eve. Q. What kind of shoes do frogs wear? A. Open-toad.