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for Barbara Mallut: I appreciated your comments on marriage and divorce. I was particularly drawn to the following statement: Barbara wrote: "And another thing, which I believe we all... EVERYONE living with a chronic illness... must consider. SURE we vowed, when we were young and healthy, to "love, honor and cherish, in sickness and in health," but the reality of the thing is that I'd be willing to bet ya that not a one of us at THAT time could ever in their wildest dreams could picture just what it'd be like to be not only the marriage partner, but also the caregiver, to someone with a debilitating, chronic disease!" If we could look into the future and see what was to happen, including sickness and death, I doubt any of us would get married, have children or want any long term relationship. Interestingly, about a month ago, a member of my support group (with PD) married. His wife-to-be at the time, had visited our support group and asked what she would be getting into marrying one with PD. We were not very supportive of the idea. You also wrote: "And, by the way, it's not at ALL uncommon for those of us who're the victim of a chronic disease to become totally self involved, to the extent that our partners are treated with less consideration than our cat or dog." There is no question to the truth of this statement. There have been too many times when I have put PD ahead of my marriage. Your comments hit home hard and deep. If you have not read the letter I sent earlier, please do so. We are prone to assume our care partner/spouse will always be there. Marriage needs work all the time. I might suggest the book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" by John Gray. For those interested, it is also out in CD-ROM. Thanks Barb, Regards, Alan Bonander