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>I am CG for my wife 62/9 and have a continues problem in convincing her
>that life must go on after PD sets in. I won't bore you with all my
>details of her PD years let me only say that there is constant
>depression which has led to isolation and constant negative attitude.

>It of course effects the entire family and myself the most.

my mother 72/10 expresses what sounds like very similar negative emotions.
this is a constant difficulty for those trying to help and for herself.
Both aides and family are pushed to the limits of their emotions very
quickly and she seems so incredibly needy and hopeless that it is almost
impossible to keep one's patience. (she remains isolated and won't talk to
a counselor or anyone)
Another interesting aspect of this was at a meeting with a neurologist
considering doing a pallidotomy. the doctors and nurses listened to "i
can't" after "i can't" (despite the fact that she could do all of the
movements to some extent). after the interviews and exams they explained in
detail how important it is for the patient to participate in the long and
difficult surgery procedure (going off meds for 12 hrs and then a 6-10 hr.
procedure), how it is of course impossible to ignore one's discomfort and
pain but that training oneself is very important to the success of the
procedure. they suggested working on the short term memory, stimulating the
mind, answering questions while in an off period, attempting to in whatever
way get "beyond the pain" as much as possible, and practice working with
those around you.
it was enlightening for me as i have been in much emotional torture over
not only how to help my mother but how to deal with other family members
about frustrations and empathy for the person-with the parkinsons'
attitude. how can i expect or ask anyone to change how they "deal" with a
disease and with their fear when i personally know that i have acted in
ways that were very difficult on those around me when i was in pain --
emotional or physical?
any input is always appreciated...
debbie
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