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SHIRLEY: Good to hear from you. How're the kids? Little Ernie Jr. had his first tooth come in and Becky's working on her Haiku-poem about family inbreeding. Lester's in the "north 40" trying to get those yams ready for harvest. Dang, aren't these here computers swell?! JETHRO: You don't have to talk about PD in this forum (unless you want to). Heck, it's just a big bulletin-board like the one at Wynn-Dixie where others can say "howdy" and chat about nothing in particular or just "fuss at one another" in front of 1400 people (rather than post to them directly and have us miss out on all the details). By the way, tell us how your garage sale went on Saturday when you get a chance...we'd all love to know. Don't worry about when people shout and wave their arms about "bandwidth" ...near as I can tell, that's some CB-radio lingo designed to scare us off from chatting with one another as all the frustrated people look on banging their "DELETE" keys. Heck, you and I are interested in what we're talking about (I think) so what does anybody else's concerns have to do with anything! Write me back soon (just hit reply; don't worry about others seeing it). SAMUEL: Bessie Mae saw toilet-paper on sale at Safeway in Flotsam City on Thursday night when she went in to buy her lottery-tickets. I think we're gonna win one day soon and leave this chicken farm behind and move to a place with indoor plumbing (this will be a blessing for Clem's "little problem"). Clem wanted to know if you watched America' Crummiest Home Videos last night. I was laughing so hard I nearly dropped my bottom teeth into my "prune-juice smoothie" (where do they find those incredibly funny home-videos?). We bought some TV-trays last week at the Stop-And-Rob in Phlegmville last Tuesday with "Wheel of Fortune" logos on them....no, you can't have them but I may leave them to you in my will. FREIDA: You should triple your Sinemet intake as soon as possible. Though I'm not a urologist who specializes in PD, I do have a bunch of letters that I can put at the bottom of each of my posts to make it look like I'm somebody that should be listened to. Heck, it's easy and you can post 3-4 times a day to this list with no one to contest your word. Try it. Some of my favorite initials are IUD, BFD, IOU, OTL and DWI (a really impressive one is GOD....some people put this one in their posts to distinguish themselves as part of an elite group of people that use delusion and fantasy to cope with reality). You should also start breaking your husband's liver-pills in half (some will tell you that they're not as effective but try that thing I mentioned about the letters after your name at the bottom....that'll scare 'em). EZRA: Exercise is important with PD. Try the "TV-remote lift" first thing in the morning (and againt to shut it off at night), work in several "bathroom shuffles" (these are usually faster first thing in the morning for some reason) and try and perfect your "whining and complaining" vocal stretching exercises. Pick a subject (any subject) and complain loudly about how PD has made it worse for you and make sure your voice reaches everybody in the household. Dang, this is so easy using Barbara Patterson's PD-list to catch up on things, say "howdy" or "thank you"or "welcome aboard" or to just simply attack one another. Sure, she probaby intended it as a means for a friendly and informative exchange of information and ideas but I think that if we keep going in the direction we're heading, we can turn this into another mindless newsgroup based on the lowest common-denominator of intelligence and maturity <grin>. Anita Life Rt 4 Corncob, Iowa