February 22, 1997 11:09 AM Dear Judith, Boy, what is there to say. You are in a tough spot - a place with seemingly few answers. My heart goes out to you. Maybe it wouldn't be all bad to not bear the burden of staying calm forever. A good cry might help. Doesn't solve anything, but it's hard to always be strong. You (and all the list) are in my prayers - for healing, strength and courage to face the days. Love and blessings, Beth+ (CG for Bob) (The Rev. Elizabeth H. Oakes, ObJN) "I have found my heaven on earth, since heaven is God and God is in my soul." - Elizabeth of the Trinity