Here's my recent favorite. Hope no one's offended. It gave me a good laugh. Two drunks met at a bar. The first one remarked that he had something to show the other. The second drunk was interested, so the first one took from his right-hand pocket a miniature piano and player. He placed him on the bar, where he immediately played an entertaining tune. "That's great!" remarked the second drunk, "Where did you get it?" "In my left pocket I have a little genie," Number one replied, "Why don't you make a wish?" "Okay," said Number two. " I wish for a million bucks!" Immediately, the bar was covered with ducks. "What is this?" he said. "I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!" "So what?' replied the first drunk, "Do you think I asked for a 14 inch pianist?"