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Linda I had to respond to y our post as you are caring a heavy load (my mother was alcoholic and I tried to be her 'rescuer'. After years I learned from al=anon that trying to control her or pour out the liquer did not do any good, I know you did not say he was alcoholic but his excessive drinking is causing you concern. I am sure this list will be a great comfort to you as the PDers can relate to his depression and probably respond with ideas. But know I care and it is so important to take care of yourself-post the serenity prqyer where you can read it daily. I'm sure you have read it but it basically says: Accept the things you cannot change and the wisdom to know the difference. Mary CG for Mel 76/11