 |
 |
^^^^^^GREETINGS FROM^^^^^^^^^^ Ivan Suzman 47/10 [log in to unmask] Portland, Maine land of lighthouses deg. F *********************************************************** Deaar Bob, Thank you for caring. It is especially appreciaated. Sometimes anger, even fury, is part of wellness. I hope you will see my post to our beloved Janet Paterson. Thank you again. IVAN On Thu, 18 Sep 1997 23:07:23 -0400 Bob Chapman <[log in to unmask]> writes: >This is a multi-part message in MIME format. >--------------89AD7703DBA6C99042724348 >Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii >Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii >Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit >Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit > >Ivan I wanted to your respond to your posting when I saw it and say >much the same thing as this reply from Janet, except I couldn't think >of how to say it without the risk of sounding like I was putting you >down, which I do not want to do. I would like to add to Janet's >suggestions that if you can't break loose from this monster then >please >get some professional help, we want you to be well again. > > > >janet paterson wrote: > >> my dear cyber-sibling ivan >> >> i am worried about you >> i don't say that lightly >> >> you must know me a little bit by now from all my postings >> i'm very reluctant to judge anyone >> >> i tend to think and mull and turn things over >> in my head before i spill them out >> >> the bare skeleton >> of your conflict with the npf >> is that this occurred some time ago [more than a year?] >> and this is the second time you've brought the details to the list >> >> far be it from me to declare the purpose of this list >> >> that authority >> if it must be exercised >> must come from the list owner, barb patterson >> who created this miraculous communication medium >> out of her own generosity and hard work >> >> i am going through my own personal crises >> we all do >> from time to time >> >> but i don't 'expect' them to be solved by anyone else >> that chore is mine alone >> and the solution must come from within me >> not from 'outside' regardless of how loving, supportive, helpful etc >> >> i need a new country and a new job >> not 'just' a little bundle of cash >> [i don't intend to 'minimize' your conflict >> but to 'force' you to look at it from a different perspective] >> >> granted, i asked the list for advice and comments >> but i am not 'expecting' them to solve my problems for me >> >> i believe that the reason we are here on this planet >> is to be given tasks to learn from >> >> if we don't learn >> for whatever reason >> the same problems keep coming up again and again >> until we finally learn how to solve them... >> and then along comes the next... >> >> you have been through tough times in the past >> and have been able to conquer them >> >> what is holding you back from that now? >> >> is it possible >> that you are becoming obsessed by this one conflict? >> >> if your thinking processes >> are getting distorted, by meds, say, how would you know? >> is there some kind of safety check? >> >> eg with cd and me >> there are one or two specific situations >> where i might behave/react in a certain specific way >> that i can now recognise as clear warning signs of cd's return >> even thru the murk >> >> >THIS must for Heaven;s sake please STOP >> >before it causes me to break down. >> >> 'it' cannot cause you to do anything or feel anything >> >> if you 'break down' >> it's because you are allowing yourself to react in this way >> >> it is sometimes very difficult to see that you have a choice here >> but you really do >> and once you comprehend that >> you will feel more empowered than you have ever felt >> >> >.. requesting me to STOP asking our listmembers to help me figure >> >out some way to be compensated for the devastation, but avoiding >> >the ordeaal of Court, I have experienced at the hands of the >> >National Parkinson's Foundation and its disappearing >> >doctor Sanchez-Ramos. This has re-opened a horrible nightmare... >> >> my dear ivan >> >> "devastation" "ordeal" "horrible nightmare" >> "cover-up" "big brother" "gestapo" "hidden forces" "quarantined" >> >> all sound to me like exaggerations of a paranoid order >> >> i am not a medico but i know how brain chemistry >> can distort my thought processes >> so that i lose perspective >> >> why not try 'flipping' your perception of the whole thing >> into a game, a cosmic joke, an absurdity >> and just laugh at it >> and let it go? >> >> "Impossible!" you say? >> believe it or not, that choice is yours >> those emotions of yours are not coming from 'out there' >> they are coming from inside you >> and that's the only place where you can deal with them effectively >> >> >The cover-up and silence the NPF is trying to impose >> >on my friends and family and myself makes me feel ... >> >> again >> you have the choice of how you feel and how you react >> >> however, if your perceptions are skewed [by meds] for instance >> than any reaction based on false or distorted perception >> is going to be skewed or false as well >> >> just because you feel an emotion >> doesn't necessarily mean that the emotion is valid >> it can't be valid if it is a response to a distorted perception >> >> when peter flintermann had that terrible med reaction >> imagine how his thought processes must have been >> twisted and distorted >> by our beloved and indispensible pd meds >> >> he wasn't 'crazy' - he was suffering medication induced psychosis >> to an extreme degree >> >> think about how a 'mild' or 'moderate' degree of the same >> might manifest itself >> >> >I've worked as hard as possible .... >> >I will continue onward in this positive way. >> >> there is no doubt whatever >> that you have been selfless and generous in your work for pd >> >> the simple fact that, at the moment, >> you cannot seem to see this list >> as a similarly selfless and generous creation by barb patterson >> rings a loud warning bell in my head >> that your normal perceptions are being distorted >> >> please know that i offer this >> not with any criticism or judgment at all >> just deep concern for you and your health >> >> i don't think the npf is the problem here >> >> your parkie sister >> >> janet >> ----- >> [log in to unmask] > > > >--------------89AD7703DBA6C99042724348 >Content-Type: text/x-vcard; charset=us-ascii; name="vcard.vcf" >Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit >Content-Description: Card for Bob Chapman >Content-Disposition: attachment; filename="vcard.vcf" > >begin: vcard >fn: Bob Chapman >n: Chapman;Bob >email;internet: [log in to unmask] >x-mozilla-cpt: ;0 >x-mozilla-html: TRUE >end: vcard > > >--------------89AD7703DBA6C99042724348-- >