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Kees, I don't know why everyone thinks they are a counselor, most folks have enough trouble managing their own lives! You are an adult, no one else can live inside your head, or should try. I am sure if you made the decision to end the marriage, it was with a great deal of thought. You are certainly an intelligent person. If you changed your mind later, you could always go back. I have what I call a miracle marriage, I can't believe it has lasted almost 26 years, so far, and we have never attempted to strangle each other. I am stubborn, and NEVER wrong, and she is stubborn and NEVER right, and I am sure she would say exactly the opposite! I say that with humor, but it is too close to the truth! We never go to bed angry, sometimes I stay awake for days! :-) In all seriousness, I wish you happiness and contentment. You are a giver, you try to help others, so you should be helped in return. Ken B