Don you are such an inspiration. I do not often reply to your posts but I always read them and wanted to tell you that I printed out your "preacher flash" to send to my adult children. And hearing about Vivian and your love for each other is an inspiration - when I feel that this devil PD is pulling our relationships apart - in you come with some new way of declaring your love for each other and believe me I am sure it humbles us all. I am glad you had a lovely Christmas with your children at home. You shouldn't feel bad about them seeing you when you are not at your best. It helps them to realise just what it is you and Vivian have to put up with. And it helps to share the burden. One of the things which bothers me as a carer is that others (and especially doctors) do not see our PWP partners when they are at their worst. In our case, they do not know of the times when Bob will say "never mind" when he has been trying to say something and he just can't get the words out. Or when, after Christmas day he confessed that it had been a long hard day for him, trying to make himself understood all day. Neither do they understand the pain with which he had to admit that he could not take on Jury duty (he was recently called up) because his speech is so unreliable - especially over time. And this is something he would have loved to do. However, he is doing what he can, and today, it is working in our daughter's back yard -- hanging a gate, tidying up or whatever. It is his way of giving, now that "conversation" is limited. Don, you may be interested to know that on Christmas day, as the sun was setting, Bob and I went to the beach and I swam while the sun set. It was lovely. We often walk on the beach in the mornings - a two KM walk followed by a swim. Our toy poodle insists on coming in too. Once in the water, she wants to be held, so we have bought a little plastic dish for her which we intend to sit her in, and we will tow it along in the water with us. We are having our hottest December for many years so we are making the most of our close proximity to the beach. All the best Joy Graham (CG Bob 58, 8+yrs)