Men--Still kings of the castle
Reasons It's Great To Be a Guy (condensed version)
1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
4. A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.
5. Monday Nite Football.
7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
8. You can open all your own jars.
10. Dry cleaners and haircutter's don't rob you blind.
11. When clicking through the channel, you don't have to
stall on every shot of someone crying.
12. Your rear end is never a factor in a job interview..
14. A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite
sex.
16. You don't have to lug a bag of useful stuff around
everywhere you go.
18. You can go to the bathroom with out a support group.
21. When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic
that everyone secretly hates you.
23. The garage is all yours.
24. You get extra credit for the slightest act of
thoughtfulness.
28. You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes.
30. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
31. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she
can still be you friend.
32. Your underwear is $10 for a three pack.
34. None of your co-workers have the power to make you
cry.
37. If you're 34 and single nobody notices.
41. Chocolate is just another snack.
43. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger
seat.
44. Flowers fix everything.
48. Three pair of shoes are more than enough.
50. You can say anything and not worry about what people
think.
53. Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you walk
into the room.
54. You can whip your shirt off on a hot day.
57. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
59. You can watch a game in silence with your buddy for
hours without even thinking "He must be mad at me"
62. You get to jump up and slap stuff.
65. You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself
to look like him.
67. You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle.
68. You can sit with your knees apart no matter what you are
wearing.
69. Same work....more pay.
70. Gray hair and wrinkles add character.
72. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
75. You don't mooch off others' desserts.
77. The remote is yours and yours alone.
78. People never glance at your chest when your talking to
them.
80. You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a
little gift.
84. You needn't pretend you're "freshening up" to go to the
bathroom.
85. If you don't call your buddy when you say you will, he
won't tell your friends you've changed.
86. Someday you'll be a dirty old man.
88. If an other guy shows up at the party in the same
outfit, you might become lifelong buddies.
90. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically
expected.
93. If something mechanical didn't work, you can bash it
with a hammer and throw it across the room.
94. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
96. You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and
anniversaries.
98. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So...
notice anything different?"
99. Baywatch
