Oooops! SMACK!! <--- Barb smacks SELF upside her head)
I can sure see it all from YOUR point of view now, Mark. Sorry for my
misinterpretation. Oddly, we're in somewhat similar situations, and perhaps
that's why I felt so defensive on behalf of your dad.
My 80 year old mom has severe dementia from several mini strokes, tho she
still recognizes me. She is on the borderline of having to move from an
excellent senior's residence that has no on-site medical or related services
except for "the pill ladies" (an agency one can hire to dispense prescribed
drugs on schedule) on the premises, to an assisted care/medical facility due
to her progressive and dramatic loss of short term memory. She's not only
struggling with the dementia but was diagnosed with Lupus only last week.
As mom's memory started to rapidly decline she clung to her apartment home of
25 years all the more, declining to even look at a senior's residence. It
took the terrible Northridge Quake in 1994 to force mom out of her apartment
because the building was destroyed by the temblor. Mom had no CHOICE at that
time because we needed to get her situated immediately. Since it was the
QUAKE that was responsible for mom's original move, I've never struggled with
guilt over THAT relocation. However, I AM dealing with guilt NOW.
Mom's contented where she is now, and has her own furnishings - lovely
antiques - in her room. I know she won't have that type of set up when she's
moved. She's on her own schedule pretty much, and can come and go at will tho
she only goes off premises accompanied by family, friends, or a social worker.
Still, that move is imminent....
I guess I'd be pressing my "luck" to expect another divine intervention on the
same scale as the Northridge Quake to get mom to move! And truthfully, I
don't think _ I _ could stand losing so much of my OWN home, again!
Whoever called it the "Golden Years" was WRONG!
Again... sorry for lambasting ya....
Barb Mallut
[log in to unmask]
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From: Parkinson's Information Exchange on behalf of Mark Klapper
Sent: Tuesday, February 03, 1998 2:57 PM
To: Multiple recipients of list PARKINSN
Subject: Re: An Update
Barb Mallut swung:
>>SMACK!! <-- Barb whollops Mark upside his wee head).
OUCH!!! that hurts...
>>Your father IS a "victim" of the disease... Please
don't make him a "victim"
of his son's lack of understanding of what it's REALLY
like to LIVE with that
disease!
That was not my intention...I'm sorry if I sounded insensitive. I was
frustrated over the lack of understanding of others that I have trusted
with my father's care and came off as insensitive myself. Not true!
It's been very tough. My father walked into the hospital seven weeks
ago in a psychotic state and now spends most of his day in a wheelchair,
after having to stop most of the meds he was taking.
There are several things that have me a bit frustrated right now:
Doctors who call back on the fly, without reading the chart, and don't
offer much in the way of advice (I think I've educated them more than
they have helped me, thanks to this list and some other resources).
An assisted living facility that can't figure out how to get the
required lab work needed for a Clozaril script. (Not that easy,btw
given the change in Medicare that took effect on 2/1) It may not be the
right choice, but I'm willing to give the place a chance.
A confused and demanding patient, who I love dearly and want only to
receive the best possible care. He calls for help to the bathroom, then
finishes up and walks out on his own. He calls my sister five or six
times a day over things like wanting ice cream in his Coke. He tells
the PT to hurry up, because he is going to a golf tournament. He asked
for $100 to buy himself some clothes...when I asked how he planned to
get to the mall, he said he would get "one of the nurses" to take him.
With sincere apologies...
Mark Klapper
