 |
 |
hi all after a detailed discussion with a dear friend i just realized that i have been using the term "acceptance" incorrectly in several on-line conversations with many of you [dennis, charlie, george, cyber-dad-don...........] e.g. the most recent being in a reply to claudia and her 'early morning musings' post: >anger / denial / bargaining / acceptance >are the stages we all go through >in dealing with any >perceived loss my not-close-enough pals, Roget and his Thesaurus, tell me that the primary synonyms of the verb 'accept' are: 1. receive, take, allow, admit 2. accede to, agree to, acknowledge, recognize 3. assume, undertake, take on 4. reconcile oneself to, suffer, endure*** in my use of the term 'acceptance' i had intended none of the negative shadings of no.4. and have concluded that a better term to properly reflect my meaning is: 'recognize': 1. identify, recall 2. acknowledge, perceive, accept, own*** 3. approve, sanction 4. honour, salute no. 2 above is the meaning i had intended and is quite different from what may have been interpreted whew! isn't the english language a challenge?! my re-evaluation resulted from a friend telling me this: >>acceptance is also saying we can't do better. >>ever. my reply in part was: >that's not what i mean by 'acceptance' at all at all... >i don't mean the negative connotations >attached to acceptance = suffer, endure, resign oneself to >i.e. give in and roll over and play dead > >i mean accept = recognize = be aware of, own, perceive >i.e. face the facts as they are today >since today is all we really have to work with >and do the best you can with what you have >rather than be-moaning what you don't have > >i certainly don't mean that all hope is lost >not at all >and yes >we can always do better >but we have to be flexible enough >to see that new methods/priorities might be called for >under new circumstances > >the pre-pd 'you' no longer exists... [just as the teenager 'you' no longer exists] >accepting your reality today >does not preclude possible changes in conditions in the future > >sorta like getting upset and depressed about getting older >why waste the energy?... > >nothing is carved in stone >none of us know >what is coming sorry this is so long, siblings, but i felt it was a pretty basic misunderstanding that i wanted and needed to correct your cyber-sis in synonym-land janet 'who we are is where we have been' janet paterson 50-9 / sinemet-selegiline-prozac almonte-ontario-canada / [log in to unmask]