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In ANY circumstance a "positive"   will make you or break you.
You can wallow in self pity or seek help from others.  I work a great deal
with people who chose to see a glass Half empty.  I realize people react to
hardship differently.    My pd is hardly easy to deal with.  That is probably
one reason I'm as effective as I am in helping those who  want help to look
for the positive.  Take it or leave it - I don't feel harsh - just realistic.
What you don't do for yourself NO ONE CAN DO FOR YOU.      Helenjc