This is a touchingly honest expression of how we have to deal with our
feelings --
SNIPPED
We were well into our talk on healing and recovery when I
>dropped all diplomacy, like clown ladies used to drop their knickers, and
>said, something like,"Well, that's fine for you. You can hope for recovery,
>even expect it, even count on it, but not me. For me it's down hill all
>the way. In fact you could say that right at this moment I'm the healthiest
>I'll be for the rest of my life."
I thought Gina was "right on" when she replied:
"is it hard to accept the kindness of others, because we deep down feel we
>are not worth the help, and compassion of others? Took me long time, but
>I am a good person, who has helped others. I have to trust others to
>help. Gina"
SNIPPED
>this man has given me his classroom as my own
>teaching classroom for next year, and has insisted that he take the worst
>of the lot of crappy rooms for himself. So now I feel bad. Perhaps I went
>too far. Perhaps I should have continued to fake good health for a while
>longer. It is he, really, who should be in the better classroom. He's
>the Head, he needs to be at the hub of the activity. But he won't hear of
>it. The discussion is closed.
SNIPPED
I've always found
>taking other people's kindness difficult. It makes me feel even more
>vulnerable, a little at their mercy. It's going to take some getting used
>to.
I think that being the recipient of kindness makes us feel "obligated" as
well as "unworthy" and "vulnerable"--and perhaps also that we MUST now be
WORTHY of the gift we have received. Perhaps it helps to remember that
just as WE feel good about being able to help others, THEY feel that way in
return when the roles are reversed, and that is a reciprocal gift you are
giving them!
Camilla Flintermann, CG for Peter, 80/9 <[log in to unmask]>
http://www.newcountry.nu/pd/members/camilla/one.htm My Home Page
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* Knowing when to insist, and when to let be,*
* is,perhaps, a lifetime learning experience *
* --Mary McCurry *
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