Hey folks...I'm concerned about a fellow list member.
This list member wishes to remain anonymous but gave me permission
to post his letter to me to the list. So here it is.
Greetings,
I'm a retired aerospace executive, 64 yrs, diagnosed 2 years ago.
My retirement plan/(dream) has been destroyed by this terrible disease.
My plan was to live an extraordinarly active life--competitive
bicycling and triathalons (age adjusted), and lots of golf, skiing,
hiking, evening walks on the beach and worldwide travel. In my career,
I worked prodigious hours with intense self-motivation so
that I could contribute to my company's competitiveness and profitable
growth. When the stress of all this compounded, I promised myself that
I would make my retirement dreams come true, so that all that
was the price I gladly paid for the satisfaction while working, and the
promise of my golden years.
Instead, I must now deal with: poor golf ability, inability to
compete in biking and triathalons, no more skiing, and with my loss
of voice volume and resonance I'm inhibited at social functions. On my
scale of things, my life is a living Hell.
Frozen, our facial expression turns people off. Loss of
strength/endurance ruins my active life, loss sexual potency causes
me anguish. Sleeplessness is severe, and compromises my car driving
(fall asleep at wheel). I can smell nothing but the strongest odors. I
hate the thought of increasing tremors, and expect that if/when it
begins, my pride will keep me from enjoying continuing friendships, and
beginning new ones--I will become a hermit. Restless leg syndrome
brought on by this curse causes me aches and pains anytime by levadopa
balance gets low, and makes impossible to sleeep, which makes me
irratable and my poor wife must deal with that.
In summary, from a man with everything to live for, I find myself
asking myself how much longer can I go on, and often my nightly prayer
is that I don't wake up."
Folks, That was his note...
I wrote back to Mr.X and told him, "you have written a powerful
description of the impact Parkinson's has made in your life and I
encouage you to share this post with all of us on the support list
for further discussion. Many others are dealing with some of the
same issues and I feel like open discussion of your experience will
benefit many. If you'd like me to post it to the group anomyously
for you for discussion, I'd be happy to help you in this way.
I hear the pain in his note and I feel he's in need of us all now.
Today he wrote me back with:
"Hi Gail,
I appreciate your response and your courtesy in suggesting an
anonymous posting of some or all of this to the list. If you believe
that doing so could help anyone else, or myself, and would do no harm,
please do so. I will watch for replies to you."
I'm glad you are reaching out for understanding Mr X and I feel
others will reach out to help to the benefit of us all.
Your cyber sis,
Gail Vass
