Dear "John"--- your message of anger, fear, disappointment, and frustration
is one we've heard before, in one way or another, from so many on these
lists. While this "club" is not one you're eager to be "welcomed to", I
hope as you read the posts here you will realize that you are experiencing
a very normal, human reaction to the discovery that you have a chronic,
progressive, disease. There are infinite differences in how PWPs and their
CGs react to this discovery. Some like our famous Don "Flash" McKinley
(bless him) fight the PD "monster" every centimeter of the way-- others are
overwhelmed with sadness, and anger turned in against themselves, which
becomes depression.
I know very well about the latter reaction, as that is how it affects my
dear husband of 55 years--he, like you, mourns the losses that PD brings,a
process which is like mourning the loss of a loved person, in many ways.
While I share his sorrow,I'm the "problem solver" type, and tend to cope by
trying to find solutions as new problems arise--keeps me out of mischief! I
guess you could say I see the doughnut, and he sees the hole :-) You
mentioned your wife, and I wonder what the "division of labor" is in your
marriage-- one of you, perhaps, the worrier, the other the "coper"? Would
she perhaps like to join the CARE list, a sublist of the main PD list for
caregivers of PWPs? I'm planning to post the instructions as soon as I
finish this letter to you.
I'm glad you found the list, and hope it will be for you, as for so many, a
virtual "support group", where you can come to know and trust the members
and learn from them as you share what you have learned and help others.
Janet, our resident expert on depression, has written wisely to you.
Please take her words to heart. I'm not going to tell you to "buck up and
look at the bright side", as you probably think there isn't one--but I will
say that many who joined the list have found healing for their pain and
comradeship in their sorrows--and there's a lot to be said for Marling's
reminder not to forget to laugh !
Just for the record--how long have you been diagnosed? What meds are you
taking? Are you seeing a PD specialist? These are all things it helps to
know about each other here, so as to respond appropriately. Please stay
connected, and write through Gail if that is more comfortable for you--
you and your family are NOT alone in this struggle!
Camilla Flintermann, CG for Peter 80/9
Oxford, OH
[log in to unmask]
"http://www.newcountry.nu/pd/members/camilla/one.htm" My Home Page
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