 |
 |
Dear Joe, >I don't know if I am alone in my situation or there are others like me and >if anyone could share some thoughts- I guess the proper term would be >'inspiration'. Nope, you aren't alone. In fact, there have been many of us who were in your same situation without PD. (I was a woman surgeon <gasp!!> who was single... talk about an intimidating thing for so many men to deal with!) When I "met" Kees, my husband, it was through the internet about 15 months ago when he entered a chat room for docs to ask about PD. I was enchanted by his friendliness and his references to how he cared for and about his children (sound familiar?). Amazingly, he wasn't bothered by my education or profession. We met a few months later when I took a vacation to his country that had been planned before we "met" on the internet. We were married 5 months ago. From the recently single and not-with-PD person's standpoint, I can say that a problem like PD will certainly make you take a good look at the person, inside and out before you decide to marry them. Probably, more people should do that before they marry anyhow. But if you see someone who is worth having when you look at them, then you will want them regardless of a disease. How do any of us know that we will have years of health? We could be hit by a car/struck by lightening/etc. at any moment. Many of my friends and family asked me why I would marry Kees knowing that we faced a strong probablility of hard times in the not-so distant future. My answer was always a question back to them (if they were married): "If you had known at the time you got married that your mate would be in an accident and be paralyzed in 10 years, would you still have married him/her?" The answer was always preceded by an expression of surprised understanding, then... "Of course! I would not have given up the good times." Sorry this has gotten so long, folks, but I believe so strongly that I have made a superb choice (and got extremely lucky!!) when I said yes to Kees. I wanted all you singles to know that what you want can happen. I would agree with many of the suggestions others have offered, and will throw in another one for you... If you are religious at all, then go to church/etc. A shared faith can get you past problems that nothing will.. or at least make them easier to get through. With best wishes for the joy and comfort of shared love and life to you and all, Faye, CG for Kees 48/9