 |
 |
I am the President-elect of the NCA (National Chainsaw Association) and I can see we are getting an image problem. Why is it, that a few wimps cut off a few fingers or a leg, and then cry to anyone who cares to listen, "chainsaws are bad." HAH! Chainsaws don't hurt people, PEOPLE hurt people! If you don't know how to USE a chainsaw, just use proper safety equipment, like a suit of armor! A pair of iron gloves would be good too. In order for the NCA to undo the damage done by all the cry babies, who think they need five fingers on each hand, we will have to feature chainsaws in movies and TV shows. We are planning Disney characters with chainsaws where their hands would have been, in more innocent times. This, to show small children, that chainsaws are fun! We will have contests where kids will be able to cut other kids hair with a chainsaw. We will also have a blood drive, to give the parents something to do. Remember: "When you see a puddle of blood..thank a chainsaw" Chainsaws help to thin out the overpopulation among loggers, etc., who might starve to death, if we did not give them a chance to hack each other into hors d'ourves ! (wait until the spell checker sees that!) If you have any questions dial 1-800-Chainsaw.