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To Janet Paterson: I thank you for caring, but I disagree with your diagnosis. I am not depressed. I used to be, but not know. I have been severely depressed, but I think I know the difference. My husband was a manic deppressive, and so possibly is my youngest daughter. But me? No. I'm unhappy, very unhappy, and sad, and angry, oh so angry, because the reason I cannot be an effective parent is not because of the way I feel, but because of the way I am. I have this physical disease, you see, it's called Parkinson's. You may have heard of it [haha, sick joke]. I've had it for about 25 years now. I am dyskinetic for about 70% of the day, now. Kicking and flailing my arms and legs in all directions, and my words and the thoughts behind them follow suit. Or I'm slumped in a chair, twisted in a knot, and slurring my words and drooling. And for some brief, blessed episodes in between, by some miracle, I turn into a living, thinking human being. But I have no way of knowing when these episodes will be. I paint a pretty grim picture. Actually, it's not as bad as all that, because I'm not all the way up all the time, or all the way down. For there are the transition periods, you know, like the old sine curve. But even so, through the eyes of a fifteen year old girl, it's hardly a pretty picture. She simply cannot handle the situation. And neither can I. And to cut a long story short, that is why I have reluctantly had to agree with the authorities that she is "a child in need of services" that I am unable to give her. Now. So I am sad she has to go away. I am annoyed because it has to be done via the courts and the foster care system for financial reasons, and I am angry, VERY ANGRY, that the whole situation has been brought about by Parkinson's Disease. AND THAT IS WHY WE HAVE TO HAVE A CURE NOW. So that I can regain control of myself, and control of my children. My children should not be in foster care. My children would not be in foster care. If it were not for Parkinson's. --Hilary Blue