Per recent discussion, I must repost a couple previous poems which I posted long ago. I (as everyone knows) also have pd, but also have ethical issues with animal research, That's one of the driving reasons behind my wanting to heal myself without any further medications, surgeries, etc. I do not believe that we necessarily have any more right to life than do they. On the other hand, I am not against eating meat, etc. Animals themselves kill to survive, that is part of the natural order. Keeping animals in cages, etc., with prolonged agony and lives full of fear, is not. As such, I believe in eating free range meat, and in some ways, believe that hunting animals is actually more humane to say, raising chickens in cages, as they at least get to lead their lives as nature intended prior to their deaths. American Indians also ate meat, however, before killing the animals, they asked for the spirit's permission, cuz the animal was not obligated to give it's life for their benefit. It was, and still is, a gift. It is not something we are inherently entitled to due to our "superiority." Our superioritiy as such lies only in the fact that we are capable of doing what we do with/to animals, not that it is our right to. Would some alien civilization far advanced from our own then have the right to do with us as they pleased, just because they could? I don't think so. It is not the killing of animals per se that I am against. All life is dependent on all other life in one way or another, even if it's killing a plant to eat it. But it's our attitude that we are more deserving of living out full, healthy lives than are animals, or that we have the right to contain them in cramped, filthy cages, etc., prior to eating them, and so on, which irks me. If we are going to kill an animal for food, then we should use all parts of it, and not waste anything and we should allow it to have as full of a life as possible prior to being killed. No creature should have to spend its entire life in a laboratory cage either, being poked and prodded after one thing or another. Also, animals are not physiologically the same as humans, and some things that we prove safe on them, turn out not to be so safe on us. Having a serious, chronic illness has in no way diminished my opinion on this matter. Once I have healed myself, in fact, one of the things I intend to do is to set up a foundation or research facilitiy, to make use of grant money which NIH already has available, to research into alternative methods of testing that do not involve animals. This may sound wacky, but I regularly call upon the animal spirits (as did the Indians) to assist me in my healing, so that I may be able to do some of these things. Wendy Tebay --------------------- I am torn Whether an animal should suffer So that I may find relief I am torn Am I selling my soul With each pill that I take? I am torn Impressed upon my mind A photograph that elicits my compassion I am torn A Rhesus monkey, kin to you and me Sits on haunches, frozen and afraid I am torn Now suffering from PD, as do I Substantia nigra damaged by MTPP I am torn As I gaze upon his image Stomach turns, tears form I am torn To force upon another This cross that I bear I am torn Looking into my dog's eyes for comfort Seeing absolute trust and affection I am torn Knowing both of us out of love Would sacrifice for the other I am torn Does this monkey know love Or only fear? I am torn Native American hunters prior to the kill Ask the animal spirit's permission I am torn Once the animal's blessing is received Respectful thanks are given for the gift I am torn Have we asked this monkey's spirit For its permission? I am torn Have we then honored him For the gift he hath given? I am torn Perhaps in knowing That proper respect had been rendered I could then find physical relief No longer needing to say "I am torn" ----------------------- THE GIFT An animal gave its life Or shall we say It was taken Collectively their lives sacrificed To protect us from our own creations Creation implies a process of renewal An infusion of the life force Into the shapeless ether However, that is not as it appears When it's a "lower" life form you've taken I embody that life force Comprising one and all And through me it speaks for those who cannot Except by their cries On our compassion the desperately call "I would perhaps gladly give my life To save a child from cancer Or a father from a failing heart But to give it solely for man's vanity Or excessive consumption Literally tears me apart." "Regarding the latter, I may lose my life, yet man loses his soul Lost bit by bit with each cry he ignores Growing further desensitized" "Numb inside from his cavalier attitude Toward life other than his own Numb outside from that which he has supposedly proven safe Yet has turned on him also" "I would give my life for my master's As she would unhesitatingly give hers for mine The gift and the love flow one to another Equally and without reserve" "To be forced to give it to someone Who does not truly value the gift Nor would consider its return Brings to mind another Who also gave the ultimate gift." "A gift of love, a gift of life For the sake of those undeserved Asking of his creator as they watched his life ebb 'Please forgive them father, for they know not what they do.' " "Now two millenia since this story occurred Ignorance hopefully illumined by compassion We simply ask that our gift be honored and respected For we feel and we suffer Just as surely as do you." --------------------- And one more which illustrates to an extent the redundant and pointless nature of much of the testing which is done: I died for a pesticide I am a mouse Or worse yet A filthy rat Or perhaps even Someone's former Pet dog or pet cat I died in order To establish A pesticide's toxicity And supposed amounts For which it can be Utilised in safety I died for a pesticide I am a grasshopper Or perhaps even Something more evil Like a locust Or maybe worse A little bollweevol I died because I was hungry And wished to eat And feasted upon Some farmer's crop Of corn or of wheat I died for a pesticide I am a peregrine falcon Or the national symbol The once proud bald eagle Both of us almost Obliterated by DDT Which is now illegal I am an alligator Originally intended by nature To have been born male Instead I now resemble Something which is Decidedly more female I died for a pesticide I am a human baby Already suffering from Childhood leukemia And I am her mother Now with breast cancer Studied by academia I am a young woman Trapped in a body Aging before its time Former dreams stolen Faced with a future That shouldn't have been mine I died for a pesticide