Hi Ivan, hi listfriends, What do you mean with really off? Off in a way that you only can wink your eyes? Hardly can speak? That you can move your arm only so slow that you need 10 mins to get a pill? I have had such moments and I thought it was to bad to experience that again. So I use my medication in time and I'm thinking of a pallidal stimulation or a tissue implantation. I don't know yet what is best for me. But I am prepared! I have my pills on a table next to my bed, or I stay up all night. When I do that I don't go off completely. I stay awake enough to fight for a little bit of movement. I take extra Sinemet and Permax during such a period. If I need to pee, I don't wait till the last moment, because it takes me a lot of time to get to the restroom and to get my pants down (I always sit down) Often I don't bother putting on my pants again. It is easier for the next time:) I can imagine that an urinal may be a handy thing for having on several places in the house. I don't care about how I look like when I'm off or and I think that's even worse : really over reactive on the medication. When I have a period that I'm much off, I want to be on, but when I have a period that I'm too much on, I want to be off. I wish I could choose, but this choice is made for us. One thing I never loose: my happiness, my patience, my will to make something of nothing, my optimism, my joy in life, my love for Jesus and for other people especially for Faye:). What I apparently have lost is my ability to count, but who cares? The only that counts are the numbers of days ticking away, getting closer to the cure. I wait patiently and patiently. Kees Paap Off & On When I'm "off", I'm slow, my arms are so heavy, that I don't know, how to fool the gravity. My legs are somewhere there below, I feel them, but can't control them, shuffling and sliding is the way to go, where I normally could run. Then there is that change, my meds start kicking in, oh that feels so strange, when my limbs are twinklin'. I know that within half an hour I will be active and alert. But it is very sour, to wait, while it still hurts. There it is ! I feel it in my muscles, the energy is there, world here I come, this feels so good that I can do it all, and I forget the hours I numbed. After a while it fades away, I return to my small world, where I want to stay, small and curled. Somedays I'm hardly "On" and others I'm over-re-active The last normal day has gone, some years ago, so negative! But here I am, my eyes have lights, I enjoy my life and my growing spirit, and know where to find the sites, to gather all the info with it. My life has changed in positive way, I gained a lot because of my disease, spriritually I feel I want to stay, In my cloud of heavenly peace. That's my dream for many "offs & on's" A cure for Parkinsons Disease, To give us back our normal ones, The search we want to seize. Kees Paap August 1, 1998