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Dear friends I hope you enjoy these as I did : Holy Humor Some people are kind, polite and sweet-spirited - until you try to get into their pew. [George Goldtrap, Madison, Tennessee] The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close. [Mark Twain] Most of us spend the first six days of the week sowing wild oats, then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure. [Fred Allen] Do you know the three times that most people are in church? When they are hatched, matched and dispatched. [Lowell B. Yoder, Holland, Ohio] Quit griping about your church; if it were perfect, you couldn't belong. [Msgr. JosephP. Dooley, Martins Creek, Pennsylvania] If a church wants a better pastor, it can get one by praying for the one it has. [Rev. Robert E. Harris] A lot of church members who are singing "Standing On The Promises" are just sitting on the premises. [Sr. Monique Rysavy] We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers. [Donna Maddux, Stillwater, Oklahoma] Every evening I turn my troubles over to God - He's going to be up all night anyway. [Donald J. Morgan, Columbus, Ohio] I don't know why some people change churches - what difference does it make which one you stay home from? [Rev. Denny Brake] If a Savior leaves you as you are and where you are, from what has He saved you? [Rev. Denny Brake] Young man, the secret of my success is that at an early age I discovered I was not God. [Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.] If your left hand doesn't know what your right hand is doing, you should consider running for a job in Washington. [Anonymous] To err is human; to blame it on somebody else is even more human. [John Nadeau, Medford, Massachusetts] Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed up and permanently set. [Rev. Denny Brake] Cheers, +----| Joao Paulo de Carvalho |------ + | [log in to unmask] | +--------| Salvador-Bahia-Brazil |------+